Human-shaped, simian-obsessed, robot-fighting, pirate-hearted, storytelling junkie, Mark A. Rayner is an award-winning writer of satirical & speculative fiction.
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npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm
Profile Code
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npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Show more details
Published at
2023-03-27T16:57:24+02:00 Event JSON
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Last Notes npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner An alternative explanation for why McDonald's sales are down. npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner Shades of Monty Python and the Holy Grail. Two horses, their owner, and an exceptionally dangerous bunny. npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner Weird dog, trying to figure out if it's safe or not. npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner Anarchy in the UK npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner This would have been good to have in 2016. npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner Finally, an explanation for R2D2's sass! npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner May the Fourth be with you -- #caturday edition! npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner They mostly come at night... mostly. npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner Periodic promo: npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner The long-crested eagle is sick of your shit. npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner This works best if you read it like a young Jenny from Forrest Gump: "Honk Jesus Honk!" npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner When you're writing a masterpiece, but you really need a nap. npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner POV: You are a very smol train. npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner An onion relish so good it IS illegal! npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner You shall be the Fellowship of the Waffle House! npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner Yay, it's another melodic #caturday [sound on] npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner Yeah, like that would work, especially on an anarchistic #caturday! npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner "Hey Bob, I know you've just dropped acid and all, but we really need the cover illustration for the Easter issue of Space Dorks magazine." npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner I hope there's a great crop of #caturday posts today! npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner Can we come in for #caturday, yet? npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner I'm saddened to report this got a look of confusion from my undergrads during the lecture on color theory this week. npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner I mean, would it kill you to let Cathy tell you about her ferrets? npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner Current mood npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner Welcome to a real edgy #caturday! npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner There are two kinds of cats: murder and doofus. npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner Welcome to an ridiculously cuddly #caturday npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner When you realize it's still just the middle of February. npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner Typography: it matters! npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner Is it too early to be thinking about happy hour? npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner @npub1m0m…s6t4 Cool -- I'll check it out. Oona Chaplin (his granddaughter?) has a new podcast out and the first episode was about how J. Edgar Hoover went after him, even before there was an FBI! npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner “All of this has happened before. All of this will happen again.” npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner I've seen enough zombie shows to know these Big Boys are breaking out and eating brains. npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner Just discovered: a more evil way to mark your place in a book than dog-earing. npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner Break in case of #caturday! npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner When you may have exaggerated, just a bit, on your resume. npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner I hope your Friday is going well, but just in case, here's a box full of puppies. npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner Monday mood npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner Beware the Laundry Goblin on this fresh-scented #caturday npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner When you're over 50 and you "slept wrong". npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner When your duck is into cosplay. npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner @npub1qag…9gyn Yeah, I feel like I messed up not double-checking! I agree -- it's a text everyone should read. npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner @npub1qag…9gyn Thanks for the heads up! Try this: https://theanarchistlibrary.org/library/umberto-eco-ur-fascism npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner Umberto Eco has a cogent essay about how to spot the signs of what he calls "Ur-Fascism", or the essential components of fascism. npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner When the temperature drops suddenly. npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner I feel you kitty, I do. [sound on] npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner Hope everyone is enjoying a restful, and liquid, #caturday! npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner Fine, but it doesn't say anything about a nice bit of graffiti npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner The siren call of the em-dash. npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner Some new proofreading marks to help your writing really jump off the page this year. npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner Visual representation of the period between Christmas and New Year's. npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner The drama queen is in fine form today! [sound on, seriously!] npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner The world's first kitty-kaiju -- Mittens -- did not appreciate being put on the "naughty list" npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner A festive feline, rolling in for a #caturday! npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner Oh, well if it's festive anxiety, no problem! npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner Zooming into a fast and furious #caturday! npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner Weird dog, catching up to you so you can give it a cuddle. npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner This is kaiju movie I'm waiting to see... npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner O' mighty elixir of morning consciousness! npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner "Some cats just want to see the world burn." [sound on for asmr] npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner The goblin has fed. npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner "Look, I'm a sphinx!" npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner The Irony Police have been alerted and are on their way! npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner When you have the Christmas spirit, but you also want your cat to murder you in your sleep. npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner This is a BIG story. [sound on] npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner The best audio engineer ever! npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner #caturday evening plans -- wine and shouting! npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner When it's finally #caturday! npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner My last post about this for a while, promise! The sale on the ebook ends tonight and won't return for a year. npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner It wimdy. npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner Sniffing out this whole Sunday thing. npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner And the sarcasm will be so sharp, you'll bleed. npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner I could have really used this book, back in 2016 when we crossed into our current timeline. npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner "Alpha Max by Mark Rayner is a hilarious read for anyone who enjoys the works of Vonnegut, Pratchett, Moore and the like. If you've ever wondered what it would be like to jump into parallel universes and meet yourself - many, many versions of yourself - this book will let you know. Or at least make you think about it." –Weyland Cadman (Amazon Reviewer) npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner Typography: It matters! npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner "Okay Mr. Snuggles, smile for the camera... Oh, no, not like that." npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner Hi hooman. I've made a terrible mistake. npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner Beans! npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner These cool dudes look like they're about to drop an album. They need a good band name though, any ideas? npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner Ah, the siren call of the em-dash. npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner Adorable! npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner Hooman! Grab my paw if you want to live! npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner Perfectly normal and safe tree. Yep, no dangers here! npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner Even the promise of pizza cannot rectify this situation. npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner So, if we're in #bleptember, can we look forward to #mlemuary? npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner Weird dog's bath day! [sound on for splishy splashy sounds] npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner Savagely accurate. npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner What a sleepy #caturday afternoon! npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner @npub13y8…786k And the electrodes? npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner "I'm good enough. I'm smart enough. And gosh-darn it, people love my silly hat." npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner @npub1u0x…q3q7 Even more reason to have a friend/colleague proofread your stuff. Don't worry, I'm aware of the irony! npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner Proofreading: It Matters! npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner When you waited too long before eating. npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner Shut up while the adults talk, Bob. npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner @npub1w8s…hlh6 I guess I'll be the voice in the wilderness on this one 😎 npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner @npub1w8s…hlh6 Well done! npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner @npub1ycc…wjwh 😂 npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner @npub1ycc…wjwh Herring? npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner Me, and how well I understand quantum mechanics. npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner Surprise, it's Monday! npub1vzs3ame329ayrgnprd974vh293zlhstmrkp40r7mmx2gs55v8g3qe7f7nm Mark A. Rayner @npub1lys…ytyz Or worse, they were changing a lightbulb
