Lizzy 💫

crocs enthusiast, cat lady, lukewarm takes at best #ADHD #TeamOrca

https://justmytoots.com/[email protected]

Public Key

npub104nd8dvv3c6mfs73vtl5endq63hhxmjvs97j79tv9ax0enfup27swn4j5h

NIP-05 Address

Profile Code

nprofile1qqs86eknkkxgudd5c0gk9l6veksdgmmndexgzlf0z4kz7n8ue57q40gpz3mhxue69uhhyetvv9ujuerpd46hxtnfduqs6amnwvaz7tmwdaejumr0dsza009p

Publishing to

relay.damus.io

nos.lol

Author Public Key

npub104nd8dvv3c6mfs73vtl5endq63hhxmjvs97j79tv9ax0enfup27swn4j5h

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Last Notes

2026-10-14 00:05:26 GMT

In a pinch, my machete doubles as a wand.

2026-08-31 17:22:32 GMT

Vote for Primrose, my adorable niece 🥰
https://babyoftheyear.org/2026/primrose-2a21

2026-08-29 22:17:47 GMT

Happy #caturday
https://media.mas.to/media_attachments/files/117/181/105/103/569/278/original/d067094cbacc69ef.jpg

2026-08-24 18:02:06 GMT

I'm what you might call a sexual being in that two people had sex and now I'm alive.

2026-08-21 18:21:26 GMT

Stop normalizing stuff, nothing is normal anymore

2026-08-14 21:20:41 GMT

[me, pretending my life is a movie and I'm the main character]
what's my motivation in this scene? oh yeah, anger!

2026-07-29 21:15:37 GMT

I hope this email defibrilates your cold dead heart.

2026-07-20 20:34:39 GMT

If by "meditation" you mean sitting in silence rawdogging your intrusive thoughts, I want no part of it.

2026-07-16 22:19:09 GMT

so just to recap... don't eat the food, don't breathe the air, don't leave your home

2026-07-15 17:54:40 GMT

Asking the gastroenterologist why I have trouble swallowing pills but not potato chips

2026-07-14 16:10:02 GMT

As if this apocalypse wasn't disappointing enough, now we're being wiped out by a diarrhea parasite

2026-05-15 04:35:32 GMT

my parents: we're so glad you're keeping busy and not just fighting with people online
me: no, I still do that

2026-05-13 02:55:49 GMT

it's bad bitch o'clock I say filling my humidifier and popping a zyrtec

2026-05-01 04:58:20 GMT

People are threatening to come and visit. Make it stop!

2026-04-23 01:52:49 GMT

it's bad bitch o'clock I say turning on my heating pad

2026-03-27 01:39:51 GMT

Introducing myself to the new neighbors by screaming at sportsball like a lunatic

2026-03-24 03:00:41 GMT

First time buying a house on my own, first time suing a builder... yup, this is definitely my year

2026-03-03 00:15:03 GMT

Silently cursing anyone who's ever given me some doodad I never wanted that I'm now responsible for moving from place to place for the rest of my life

2026-01-24 08:01:11 GMT

Ok, Bye... if that's you're real name!

2026-01-14 15:23:20 GMT

Nothing new to add but I've never let that stop me from posting

2025-12-29 07:15:27 GMT

- reply

@nprofile…5lrj
Ahhhhhhhhhhh lmmaaaooo 💀💀😂😅

2025-12-29 06:53:07 GMT

Normalize 'alone' not being a bad word.

2025-12-11 12:47:50 GMT

I prefer the strong solvent type.

2025-12-08 21:23:54 GMT

I say I'm fine a lot for someone who's still alive

2025-12-02 22:13:45 GMT

How the Grinch stole your catalytic converter then hawked it for meth in order to start an assisted living facility not covered by Medicare

2025-11-21 23:42:15 GMT

Women, we could definitely learn a thing or two from cats about protecting our peace

2025-11-21 20:44:56 GMT

the sluttiest thing a man can do is fuck all the way off

2025-11-20 14:25:53 GMT

Me: I need the utmost privacy in phones, chats, searches
Also me: posts every thought that enters my mind online

2025-11-19 20:48:59 GMT

Your honor, I'd like to direct your attention to exhibit A... you gonna finish that?

2025-11-18 17:03:57 GMT

Fool me once, shame on you.
Fool me twice... yeah that sounds about right

2025-11-17 16:39:33 GMT

Don't ask me how I slept unless you want the hourly play-by-play

2025-11-15 03:17:58 GMT

- reply

@nprofile…5lrj nor the messy pigtails lol

2025-11-14 23:04:17 GMT

Touching grass to pick up dogshit still counts, right?

2025-11-13 14:42:27 GMT

The beatings will continue until I'm tired of beating you.
-me, playing Scrabble

2025-11-13 03:29:38 GMT

I have nothing in common with people who let a bag of chips go stale.

2025-11-13 03:06:29 GMT

- reply

@nprofile…7ppx sounds wonderful

2025-11-12 21:15:20 GMT

I bet a factory reset would fix me

2025-11-11 15:06:10 GMT

me, as a therapist: omg samesies

2025-11-11 04:47:30 GMT

As a semi-sane person I had no idea I'd be yelling at my microwave and dryer this often

2025-11-10 17:28:04 GMT

- reply

@nprofile…vkq7 at least store credit, right? 🤷‍♀️

2025-11-10 15:35:27 GMT

Showed up for Monday again
0 stars... do not recommend

2025-11-07 00:23:52 GMT

She was a 10 but claimed something hurt her "fillings"

2025-11-05 13:53:42 GMT

- reply

@nprofile…k48u @nprofile…nydn
Ohhh, I hadn't read that far. It gets injected where now?

2025-11-04 23:11:34 GMT

I'm sorry, do what now?
https://media.mas.to/media_attachments/files/115/493/947/988/295/327/original/f8b2dc63554847e8.png

2025-11-04 14:42:28 GMT

yeah yeah I'm coming, just gotta quickly go thru the internet and like 200 posts

2025-11-03 23:49:22 GMT

Bluesky's implementing a dislike button. In other news, I'll be spending a lot more time here.

2025-10-31 14:43:48 GMT

Alright, alright, alright ... here's to everyone having a spooktacular Halloween 🎃
https://media.mas.to/media_attachments/files/115/469/308/356/065/677/original/428b10b36c52f7d9.jpeg

2025-10-31 02:29:52 GMT

- reply

@nprofile…g67x 💅

2025-10-31 02:25:22 GMT

PSA: please know I'm fine this is just me posting

2025-10-30 17:16:12 GMT

I put the imp in simpleton

2025-10-30 15:23:39 GMT

Accidentally got some wet cat food in my mouth and tbh it wasn't that bad. We might survive the apocalypse after all.

2025-10-27 17:11:40 GMT

Not to be rude, classmate from the 90s, but maybe your selfies should include alt text for why you let yourself go.

2025-10-24 02:40:03 GMT

it's bad bitch o'clock I say putting on my strawberry shortcake pj pants

2025-10-23 18:58:06 GMT

Buttholes seem to be the trending topic across platforms... the internet is healing

2025-10-22 15:56:51 GMT

This daydream coulda been a nap

2025-10-21 23:29:37 GMT

The Fediverse... where your butthole is like family.

2025-10-21 14:21:25 GMT

every damn day
https://media.mas.to/media_attachments/files/115/412/589/693/103/422/original/934e08843960d5ca.jpg

2025-10-20 18:47:31 GMT

- reply

@nprofile…szc4 it's awesome, right 😅

2025-10-20 17:59:56 GMT

me, watching y'all scroll past my posts without boosting
https://media.mas.to/media_attachments/files/115/407/791/134/964/613/original/c22737f444fe3517.jpeg

2025-10-19 02:06:48 GMT

- reply

@nprofile…5lrj ummm thanks 😏 (i think lol)

2025-10-19 01:48:21 GMT

A mute list but for my intrusive thoughts

2025-10-17 22:47:21 GMT

- reply

@nprofile…g67x what? you might be confused... boosting, not stealing lol

2025-10-17 22:32:49 GMT

If I repost your same post on two different sites... just know you're sort of a big deal (to me)

2025-10-17 21:22:59 GMT

Thinking about having a few drinks and making questionable decisions online tonight

2025-10-17 19:53:31 GMT

You want a side piece... where's your holster?

2025-10-17 04:43:37 GMT

- reply

@nprofile…5lrj wait, how do you do that? 😅
@nprofile…00sq

2025-10-17 04:33:32 GMT

- reply

@nprofile…5lrj girl... I'll edit to take out an extra space idgaf

2025-10-17 04:30:40 GMT

Yeah I just edited an emoji response... and?

2025-10-16 19:24:11 GMT

Fuck that bitch (me, grocery shopping a couple days ago) and her "healthy" choices

2025-10-16 13:15:49 GMT

live love lmao

2025-10-15 21:28:47 GMT

- reply

@nprofile…5lrj I started to rewatch with my daughter this summer but she lost interest. Need to go back now

2025-10-15 17:43:05 GMT

you can tell a lot about a woman by the way she cuts a brake line

2025-10-14 15:55:01 GMT

Being swallowed by a massive sinkhole might fix me

2025-10-14 15:09:48 GMT

If I unboost or like then immediately boost again, just know it's the fat fingers talkin

2025-10-14 01:50:11 GMT

who up sharing way too much on the internet again?

2025-10-13 14:55:43 GMT

Poundtown called, they want their cake back

2025-10-12 21:02:19 GMT

"Tell your doctor if you have a parasitic infection"... mfr YOU TELL ME!

2025-10-12 12:49:09 GMT

could a depressed person do this?
[eats a third bagel]

2025-10-09 20:40:27 GMT

alt text for your hurt feelings

2025-10-09 19:17:46 GMT

This place still has the juice
(reply guys from hell)

2025-10-09 00:56:57 GMT

who's hosting the first potluck? i'll bring some pot

2025-10-08 16:22:35 GMT

at this age "get it girl" typically refers to that new prescription

2025-10-08 05:16:24 GMT

Have to admit I'm surprised there are ppl awake here after midnight 🙌 y'all this might actually work

2025-10-08 02:37:08 GMT

you guys i did a thing
https://media.mas.to/media_attachments/files/115/336/203/291/264/835/original/e00a7ee2610d7981.jpg

2025-10-07 02:17:21 GMT

People don't say amazeballs enough anymore

2025-10-05 15:03:32 GMT

Told my cat she's famous on the internet and she is livid.

2025-10-03 23:55:56 GMT

- reply

@nprofile…775a ok! 😂

2025-08-20 13:08:55 GMT

might not remember how skinny feels but damn this cake tastes good

2024-08-31 06:49:51 GMT

Beto! Stop, please stop... I just can't

2024-07-24 04:32:37 GMT

I love Mastodon but also feel like my time here is coming to an end 🫶

2024-07-02 02:23:35 GMT

Imagine the summer we'd be having if Mike Pence had only had the courage!

2024-07-02 02:02:45 GMT

The basic bitch in me is pissed at tomorrow me for being so needy

2024-06-27 15:03:12 GMT

- reply

@npub1sfl…gczt yes, those are nearly impossible to kill

2024-06-27 15:00:53 GMT

- reply

@npub1sfl…gczt 😅

2024-06-27 14:59:22 GMT

I'm that neighbor who gives you plant clippings then judges you on how well they flourish.

2024-06-23 14:22:20 GMT

Good morning 🌞
#SilentSunday
https://media.mas.to/media_attachments/files/112/666/375/512/041/990/original/cfe3223eca759e1e.jpg

2024-05-16 02:08:10 GMT

My therapist said I need a hobby that gets me out of the house. So, next week's session will be at her office.

2024-05-14 04:12:05 GMT

Big day tomorrow... can't sleep.
Can't sleep... gonna fuck up big day tomorrow. Classic conundrum

2024-05-12 16:14:04 GMT

Happy Mother’s Day, Mom. Sorry I raised the bar so high for all your other kids.

2024-05-10 00:10:27 GMT

Sorry I missed your call. I actually heard it ring, picked up my phone to answer but then saw it was you