Darth Putin

Czar for life of all Russians. Master Strategist. Thought leader. Influencer. Content creator. Author. Wanted in 123 countries. Parody, apparently.
My book: https://a.co/d/hXK3beo

Public Key

npub18lq7jquxm3a9w6598tw66u6e54trf7m93dx35lasdt8syfjdjp3q6ksena

NIP-05 Address

[email protected]

Profile Code

nprofile1qqsrls0fqwrdc7jhd2zn4hddwdv62435ldjckng607cx4nczyexeqcspz4mhxue69uhhyetvv9ujuerfw36x7tnsw43qxlfnvd

Publishing to

relay.ditto.pub

Author Public Key

npub18lq7jquxm3a9w6598tw66u6e54trf7m93dx35lasdt8syfjdjp3q6ksena

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Last Notes

2026-03-20 06:45:19 GMT

Can someone explain how to bridge bluesky to here? Medvedev is too drunk to do it.

2025-12-16 11:25:56 GMT

As if leaving me with another submarine that now can't sink, to go with all the ships that now don't float, the Ukrainians even hacked our surveillance cameras so we filmed their attack for them.
https://s3.eu-central-2.wasabisys.com/mastodonworld/media_attachments/files/115/728/994/002/928/466/original/e30dc02714554d2b.mp4

2025-12-15 19:41:08 GMT

It's Monday. You might hate your job. But at least you're not a russian general about to tell Putin that you lost the city you've claimed to have captured 4 times.

2025-12-05 07:44:33 GMT

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You'd think it would be humiliating for Russian diplomats to learn that CNN knew more about the intentions of the Russian government than they did. By they have a kink for this kind of thing. It's part of our traditional values.

2025-12-05 07:44:04 GMT

OTD in 2021 my parody embassy in DC informed us that US claims on Russia's plans to invade Ukraine proved to be false.
Which is why you can believe we want peace now
https://s3.eu-central-2.wasabisys.com/mastodonworld/media_attachments/files/115/665/839/142/863/497/original/d0b9cb8d72b51f7b.jpeg

2025-12-05 07:34:53 GMT

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Also, the USSR was amazing & made greatest technical advancements in human history which means Soviet engineers in Ukraine could never have made a delivery system for these nukes even though they can also attach hellfire missiles to mosquitos now.
I am surrounded by idiocy.

2025-12-05 07:34:34 GMT

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As loyal anti imperialists know this was null and void cos CIA overthrew Yanukovich and one day we'll reveal the proof we're the victims but for now it's better that we lose 100,000s of troops cos we're morons like that.
It also make no mention of any promise made by NATO. Odd.

2025-12-05 07:34:07 GMT

OTD in 1994 Russia signed the Budapest memo, guaranteeing Ukraine's territorial integrity in exchange for their nukes,
44 Ukrainian heavy bombers (Tu-22) and 1,068 Kh-55 cruise missiles.
Which have been fired at Ukraine in this war.
https://s3.eu-central-2.wasabisys.com/mastodonworld/media_attachments/files/115/665/799/935/119/066/original/83c743a79d4c3c91.jpeg

2025-12-04 18:02:23 GMT

Going thru customs in India today:
- Name?
- Vladimir Vladimirovich Putin
- Occupation?
- No, those are self defence militias and Russia is not involved

2025-12-04 17:39:16 GMT

OTD in 1975 Hannah Arendt died.
"The ideal subject of totalitarian rule is not the convinced Nazi or the convinced Communist, but people for whom the distinction between fact & fiction and the distinction between true & false no longer exist".

2025-12-04 11:45:20 GMT

But my trolls claim the only person who ever said it would take 3 days was some US general, yet here is a russian general saying it.
Prez confused.

2025-12-04 11:44:09 GMT

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@nprofile…3ujw quite a position to take given this is a man who claims his personal Vietnam was not getting an STD.

2025-12-04 11:35:48 GMT

OTD in 2009 Russia reaffirmed commitment to the Budapest Memorandum signed 15 years previously.
Which is why you can trust us on the "peace deal" now proposed.

2025-12-03 19:16:46 GMT

I have rejected my own proposals for peace that I had Donald present to me.

2025-12-03 07:11:07 GMT

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@nprofile…ch0e @nprofile…2h8g let us try to remain gentlemanly in front of the lady. Murderous psychopathy is one thing but this is quite another.

2025-12-02 20:04:38 GMT

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@nprofile…2h8g
https://s3.eu-central-2.wasabisys.com/mastodonworld/media_attachments/files/115/651/750/509/314/893/original/f5dcb77f2a0bf0a2.mp4

2025-12-02 19:43:00 GMT

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@nprofile…2h8g it's only a rumor darling. In unrelated matters, nice dress.

2025-12-02 19:39:54 GMT

Rumor has it I'm actually gay. Sorry.

2025-12-02 14:46:23 GMT

Today is the 5th time we've captured Pokrovsk. A major defeat for the american empire.....

2025-12-01 15:09:32 GMT

The view from the bunker.
Russia gets the land
Donald gets a bribe
Ukraine gets a lie
https://youtu.be/790T13r61mc

2025-12-01 15:04:06 GMT

I tell Trump my peace terms, Trump tells Witkoff what they are and then Witkoff tells me Trump's terms that I told him then I say they aren't enough so we both blame Ukraine for me not accepting my own terms and I keep attacking them.
Rinse. Repeat.

2025-12-01 11:24:30 GMT

According to BBC, defending yourself is an escalation.
https://s3.eu-central-2.wasabisys.com/mastodonworld/media_attachments/files/115/644/056/751/877/877/original/44d99c9d1527482d.jpeg

2025-12-01 11:21:46 GMT

OTD in 1918 USSR invaded Latvia. This is how Russia became the world's largest country. We keep peacefully attacking our neighbours.

2025-12-01 07:30:46 GMT

OTD in 1991 Ukrainians, including those in Crimea, voted overwhelmingly for independence from USSR.
I don't like that vote result, so I am changing the voters and having new votes.

2025-11-30 19:29:13 GMT

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There's a range of flamingo and spiderweb products too.
https://s3.eu-central-2.wasabisys.com/mastodonworld/media_attachments/files/115/640/300/192/324/761/original/2c4bb64f883a22a9.png
https://s3.eu-central-2.wasabisys.com/mastodonworld/media_attachments/files/115/640/300/193/789/603/original/b25dc8fbc85455e8.png

2025-11-30 19:27:34 GMT

The "Peace talks" are good time to learn how to negotiate like Master Strategist from newest book “Darth Putin Guide to Master Strategy”. And help our charity too. Plus there's a discount for xmas.
https://t.co/lC4OOb8l7I
https://s3.eu-central-2.wasabisys.com/mastodonworld/media_attachments/files/115/640/293/600/487/162/original/4a08005df63f7a68.png
https://s3.eu-central-2.wasabisys.com/mastodonworld/media_attachments/files/115/640/293/623/894/866/original/972e0484f24ff3c9.png

2025-11-30 13:48:24 GMT

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You’d think after 12 years we’d release exhaustive, authoritative proof the US was behind this & convince Europe we’re the victims. That would be in our in our interest. You’d think.
But my trolls don’t think so they stick with a bunch of racist stereotypes about how eastern europeans can't protest without western help.

2025-11-30 13:47:08 GMT

OTD in 2013 @nprofile…eqfy began its “coup” by sending group of unarmed students to repeatedly headbutt the batons & boots of peaceful riot policemen so as to start Euromaidan so Nyland could give them cookies.
https://s3.eu-central-2.wasabisys.com/mastodonworld/media_attachments/files/115/638/955/076/954/145/original/ec1e38997f1b2096.jpeg

2025-11-30 13:41:53 GMT

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We genuinely pretend we don't understand why our former colonies find NATO so popular. It would be completely impossible for us to just be a better option than NATO is to them.
Besides. We got that promise I used to forget we had when I said it was them to decide if they joined.

2025-11-30 13:41:26 GMT

OTD in 1951 3rd wave of Operation Osen deportations began. 20,000 Lithuanians were forcibly deported to Siberia as USSR continued to "liberate them from fascism" 6 years after WW2 ended
Imagine mass deportations happening today...
https://s3.eu-central-2.wasabisys.com/mastodonworld/media_attachments/files/115/638/932/657/653/450/original/16f315e95cf8bd72.jpeg

2025-11-30 13:36:37 GMT

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Ofc, we didn't actually invade Finland. We "assisted" the new "legitimate government" who "asked" for help after tiny Finland aggressively attacked USSR just as our army was peacefully massed on their previous border in attack formation.
Again. Imagine that happening today

2025-11-30 13:36:10 GMT

OTD in 1939 USSR began to liberate Finland from themselves in the Winter War. It followed denials, a false flag, a bullshit excuse, us deliberately targeting civilians while we took massive casualties we lied about.
Imagine that happening today...

2025-11-30 13:31:36 GMT

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This is now widely regarded as the formal kick off to "takes that aged like milk" season. Many, many people have many many causes to feel shame and shut up.

2025-11-30 13:31:15 GMT

OTD in 2021 Russian Embassy on Londonograd reported that US & UK were manipulating false claims of a Russian invasion & occupation of Ukraine to spread panic.
Which is why you can believe us now we say we want peace
https://s3.eu-central-2.wasabisys.com/mastodonworld/media_attachments/files/115/638/892/326/103/040/original/6da566bdba1aa558.png

2025-11-28 18:19:47 GMT

This peace deal only has 3 steps.
1. Russia gets the land
2. Trump gets a bribe
3. Ukraine gets an empty promise

2025-11-28 15:28:37 GMT

Imagine escaping KGB only to get arrested by American version.

2025-11-28 15:27:57 GMT

Andriy Yermark resigning would be a disaster.
Russians might get idea that corrupt, incompetent officials will have to leave once their shady deals are exposed.

2025-11-28 08:31:19 GMT

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We did not and had to be forced to do as we promised. It's a tradition.

2025-11-28 08:31:09 GMT

OTD in 1943 at the Tehran conference USSR reaffirmed Iranian independence and promised to remove troops as per treaty the of 1942 once war was over.
Can you guess what happened once war was over?

2025-11-28 08:25:57 GMT

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Proving it didn't just "blow up" and that another imperialist narrative is crushed.

2025-11-28 08:25:50 GMT

At Roskosmos space facility our rocket suffered a rapid, unscheduled disassembly that was part of the plan
https://s3.eu-central-2.wasabisys.com/mastodonworld/media_attachments/files/115/626/366/696/582/776/original/d9baa37434dd8819.mp4

2025-11-27 20:00:40 GMT

We had @nprofile…s6j2 down to the bunker to discuss the "peace plan", Pokrovsk & whether Russia is winning...
Like & subscribe
https://youtu.be/d6FHGYyKyhk

2025-11-26 21:09:20 GMT

We had General Ben Hodges down to the bunker again.
Russia isn't winning this war. Patreons, even free, can see it ahead of time.
https://www.patreon.com/posts/144472926?utm_campaign=postshare_creator&utm_content=android_share

2025-11-26 20:27:33 GMT

Xmas sale for Prez's books. Learn how to be loyal anti imperialist, especially in the run up to special military operation - Venezuela edition.
Donations to Ukraine for each copy sold.
https://darths-eu-webshop-shop.fourthwall.com/promo/MERRYXMASDARTH
https://s3.eu-central-2.wasabisys.com/mastodonworld/media_attachments/files/115/617/880/343/984/249/original/23184f29e228178d.jpg
https://s3.eu-central-2.wasabisys.com/mastodonworld/media_attachments/files/115/617/880/427/836/096/original/a0ecc6416e1d9194.jpg

2025-11-26 18:24:08 GMT

Looks like I might need that OnlyFans account after all.
https://s3.eu-central-2.wasabisys.com/mastodonworld/media_attachments/files/115/617/395/207/529/256/original/d021d4d66d33cc0f.jpg

2025-11-26 18:21:03 GMT

Do not believe anything until the Kremlin denies it™️
https://s3.eu-central-2.wasabisys.com/mastodonworld/media_attachments/files/115/617/383/132/270/217/original/e2dbbb70d7d1a25a.jpg

2025-11-26 15:16:40 GMT

Who is surprised wikileaks didn't leak the call with Witkoff getting his instructions from Kremlin?

2025-11-26 12:33:04 GMT

Put another way, the Trump regime is happy to help Russia kill kids as it means you're not talking about how they fucked them.

2025-11-26 12:29:34 GMT

The trump regime is at the stage where it is happy for you to talk about its treason as it stops you talking about its pedophillia.

2025-11-26 10:59:14 GMT

OTD in 1939 USSR staged the Mainila incident. A false flag to justify invading Finland as per our alliance with Nazis. We claimed Finn's attacked us just as a few hundred thousand of our soldiers were massed on their former border.
Imagine such brutality being tolerated & excused today.

2025-11-26 10:20:14 GMT

The audio leak of Witkoff colluding with the Kremlin just proves the Trump admin never has or will colluded with the Kremlin.

2025-11-25 16:07:05 GMT

The "Peace Plan"
Point 1. We re affirm Ukraine's sovereignty.
Point 2-28. We remove Ukraine's sovereignty.

2025-11-24 13:53:19 GMT

It's somewhat amusing that you can pass yourself off as a Russia expert commenting on this "peace deal" as messy but at least "a way to end the war" without realising Kremlin sees it as just a tactic to continue it later.
It will end nothing.

2025-11-24 08:42:14 GMT

OTD in 2015 Turkey shot down a Russian jet in their airspace after we kept violating their border.
Our response was to sanction Turkish tomatoes. So in fact they also shot down our red lines.

2025-11-24 08:38:31 GMT

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Our original "liberation" had absolutely nothing to do with a secret clause in one of our treaties with the Nazis that we were forced to sign cos West wouldn't let us have all of Poland to commit genocide in.

2025-11-24 08:38:18 GMT

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Within 6 months we would re-commence mass deportations to Siberia that'd be called ethnic cleansing if we had the balls to face our past.
As it is we have to pretend we have no idea why NATO is so popular with so many of our former colonies.

2025-11-24 08:38:04 GMT

OTD in 1944 Red Army completed operation to 'liberate' #Estonia, #Lithuania & #Latvia from Nazis. Who had 'liberated' them from us.
Who had 'liberated' them from themselves.
https://s3.eu-central-2.wasabisys.com/mastodonworld/media_attachments/files/115/603/765/427/327/891/original/b74e24e4cae132e1.jpg

2025-11-23 20:16:25 GMT

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It's not "parody". But it is true.

2025-11-23 20:16:10 GMT

We are killing Ukrainian kids again right now.
Russia attacked Ukraine every single day Trump was POTUS the 1st time
Russia has attacked Ukraine every single time Trump has been POTUS 2nd time.
And he's helped us kill each time.

2025-11-23 16:11:47 GMT

You've all forgotten I said I can't sign a deal with Zelensky cos I said he's illegitimate.

2025-11-23 16:10:49 GMT

Remember Trump's minerals deal that would guarantee Ukraine?
Good. Me either.

2025-11-23 14:10:02 GMT

Liubov and Prez talked the "peace plan" over. Russia gets land, Donald gets a bribe and Ukraine gets some empty promises.
https://youtu.be/4GhVS_Gmvm0

2025-11-23 12:49:24 GMT

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All protests for better government against our cronies are western plots. People in these countries are incapable of demanding this for themselves without CIA help. This isn't demeaning and it's not ironic that "anti racists" are most likely to believe this.

2025-11-23 12:48:59 GMT

OTD in 2003 CIA & Soros staged Rose Revolution in Georgia. A gay, fascist, russophobic pogrom which eventually caused Georgia to invade itself with Russian soldiers cos Russia is peaceful country surrounded by ceasefires.

2025-11-23 12:47:27 GMT

OTD in 2004 German Chancellor Gerhard Schröder called me a "flawless democrat"
A statement that has stood the test of both time & special military operation.

2025-11-23 12:27:50 GMT

OTD in 2006 Alexander Litvinenko died from complications of saying Vladimir Putin is a corrupt peadophile ☕️ 🍣
One of the witnesses at the inquest later 'committed suicide by stabbing himself several times'
https://s3.eu-central-2.wasabisys.com/mastodonworld/media_attachments/files/115/599/007/345/493/126/original/883b0fa7c6ae933e.jpg

2025-11-22 21:09:27 GMT

Medvedev too drunk to figure out how to bridge bluesky.

2025-11-22 21:08:55 GMT

Today is 92nd anniversary of Holodomor. Soviet Russia inflicted a man made famine on Ukraine that killed millions. Today we are trying to wipe the country off the map.
The only difference is the USA is on our side now.

2025-11-22 20:28:51 GMT

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@nprofile…f4gv ?

2025-11-22 20:01:47 GMT

Have you missed Prez?

2024-11-12 07:25:49 GMT

OTD in 2002 i threatened to castrate a journalist who asked about civilain casualties caused by me carpet bombing Grozny.
You didn't listen when I told you who I am. And here we are.

2024-11-07 08:24:17 GMT

OTD in 1917 the Red Revolution. An illegal, foreign backed-coup aimed at constraining & breaking Russia apart, overthrew the legitimate government in the first "color revolution".
https://s3.eu-central-2.wasabisys.com/mastodonworld/media_attachments/files/113/440/709/250/732/216/original/2c9c863ce5b68231.png

2023-12-23 10:28:02 GMT

I shot down MH17 and killed hundreds of Dutch people. Now the Dutch are ready to send F-16s.
The dildo of consequences rarely arrives lubed.

2023-12-23 10:23:44 GMT

OTD in 2016 Assange said there isn't a need for @wikileaks in Russia cos there are “competitors like @Navalny”.
Whom we tried to kill. More than once. And jailed. And now disappeared, presumed dead.
https://s3.eu-central-2.wasabisys.com/mastodonworld/media_attachments/files/111/629/239/403/798/157/original/86a839b5ea1894fa.png

2023-12-06 12:56:19 GMT

According to my vodka advent calendar Christmas was 2 days ago.

2023-11-28 18:24:02 GMT

“Finland” closing their current border with Russia means I may have to move more soldiers there. Where they will be close to the 200,000 buried there from last time we invaded.

2023-11-26 16:36:21 GMT

OTD in 1939 USSR staged the Mainila incident. A false flag to justify invasion, we claimed Finland attacked us just as hundreds of thousands of our soldiers were accidentally massed in attack formation right on their former border.
Imagine such bullshit being tolerated today....

2023-11-22 13:15:26 GMT

Day 637 of my 3 day war. Winter has arrived. In response to Ukraine's "terrorist attacks" on my peaceful civilian cruise missiles, I will attack Ukraine’s military fresh water plants, power stations & hospitals.
I remain a master strategist.

2023-11-21 10:00:37 GMT

Day 636 of my 3 day war. My trolls believe only USA benefits from the war which is why I won’t end it.
I remain a master strategist.

2023-10-15 10:04:33 GMT

Tankies: Palestinians must resist occupation even if lives are lost. Imperialism must be opposed.
Also tankies: Ukraine should not resist occupation cos lives will be lost. Imperialism must be appeased.

2023-10-09 17:12:00 GMT

So:
-Tankies: “Resisting invasions is now good”
-Russia: “Invasions are bad”
-Republicans: “Sending arms to fight invasions is good”
-China: “A two state solution is now good”

2023-09-19 18:23:40 GMT

Not sure I have the hard currency to pay for Twitter…

2023-08-05 12:58:09 GMT

If convicted of all charges he’s facing, Donald Trump faces 641 years. Or about 4 Russian presidential terms.

2023-07-17 07:46:55 GMT

Day 509 of my 3 day war. Another section of the Crimea bridge has been promoted to submarine.
I remain a master strategist.

2023-07-15 11:33:20 GMT

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We lied on RT to millions but when @JuliaDavisNews exposed it we ‘apologized’ to a few thousand on this tiny Press account & tweeted it direct so even fewer would see it.
What Chomsky would call ‘manufactured consent’ - not that he or his cult give a shit when we do it.
https://s3.eu-central-2.wasabisys.com/mastodonworld/media_attachments/files/110/717/881/380/940/799/original/7485331625e51e79.png

2023-07-15 11:32:42 GMT

OTD in 2014 @rt_com ‘apologized’ for airing a fabricated story about a child being crucified in Ukraine to provide justification for our invasion that has killed thousands.
Yesterday the people who made it up starting admitting it was a lie.
https://s3.eu-central-2.wasabisys.com/mastodonworld/media_attachments/files/110/717/878/436/302/616/original/de7bc8aabf36e91d.png

2023-07-15 11:29:32 GMT

OTD in 1963 Egon Bahr proposed “Wandel durch Handel” (change through trade) with authoritarian regimes so as to bring about positive political change.
It’s been a brilliant success cos we’ve never invaded anyone and totally haven’t used the money on weapons.

2023-07-14 11:11:22 GMT

Day 506 of my 3 day war. It’s going so well I am having a purge of any vaguely competent general.
I remain a master strategist.

2023-07-14 11:10:59 GMT

OTD in 2022 we killed 29 people, incl 3 kids at Vinnytsia. The tankie guide:
1 It never happened
2 They were Nazis so deserved what didn't happen
3 NATO/Soros/🇺🇦 staged it
4 What didn't happen to Nazis who deserved it/actors who staged it was a biolab
5 What about Iraq
Repeat

2023-07-14 11:10:39 GMT

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Soviet forces were in these countries as a result of absolutely nothing to do with one of treaties with the Nazis that had a secret clause. They were ‘invited’ in.
Imagine that happening today.

2023-07-14 11:10:15 GMT

OTD in 1940, Baltic countries, having been illegally invaded & occupied, held ‘elections’ whose results were released day before vote.
Imagine that happening today.

2023-07-11 07:31:26 GMT

This week Turkey has
-Said its Navy will enforce the Black Sea grain deal for 2 years
-Open a bayraktar plant in Ukraine
- Supply self propelled artillery to Ukraine
- Allowed Sweden into NATO
I remain a master strategist.

2023-07-10 20:17:21 GMT

Unfriending Erdogan.

2023-07-05 06:42:17 GMT

They are “lying us into a new Cold War with Russia” as a result of this war we said would never happen.
The hard part about doing propaganda is that the past changes so quickly you have no idea what will happen yesterday.
https://s3.eu-central-2.wasabisys.com/mastodonworld/media_attachments/files/110/660/110/851/761/698/original/d6de9e3211bd4f13.png
https://s3.eu-central-2.wasabisys.com/mastodonworld/media_attachments/files/110/660/111/990/354/152/original/b7a40d6188edfa44.png

2023-07-05 06:34:25 GMT

Day 497 of my 3 day war. My trolls believe we must appease Russia in case we nuke you also believe Russia would never blow up a nuclear power plant to nuke you.
I remain a master strategist.

2023-07-04 06:47:40 GMT

Day 496 of my day war. Russian air defences successfully intercepted a drone near Moscow. Unfortunately the intact debris then struck intended target and detonated.
I remain a master strategist
https://s3.eu-central-2.wasabisys.com/mastodonworld/media_attachments/files/110/654/472/064/302/548/original/fa35f30983d91f0a.png

2023-07-03 16:50:51 GMT

Medvedev is distracting everyone from the fact we can’t beat Ukraine by reminding everyone of the time we couldn’t beat Finland either.
I am surrounded by idiocy.

2023-07-03 14:26:49 GMT

Western tanks are simultaneously a major escalation whilst no problem cos we destroyed them all in our glorious advance backwards.
https://bird.makeup/users/tassagency_en/statuses/1675822976925675520

2023-07-02 06:54:16 GMT

Googling “why Elon set rate limits”..

2023-04-18 11:22:02 GMT

To help reduce losses to Ukraine, I advised my generals to stop camouflaging the inside of things and try it on the outside.
I remain a master strategist.
https://s3.eu-central-2.wasabisys.com/mastodonworld/media_attachments/files/110/219/553/804/110/625/original/5b59a1d8f91a9b9e.jpeg