Low Quality Facts

https://mstdn.social/@lowqualityfacts

Low Quality Facts written in arguably lower quality handwriting.

Patreon: https://patreon.com/lowqualityfacts

Public Key

npub18rv2g0z2y40y77cx2zhvyulsrk4yqpdfawqeflz8cesc8trhc4tstx74cc

NIP-05 Address

[email protected]

Profile Code

nprofile1qqsr3k9y839z2hj00vr9ptkzw0cpm2jqqk57hqv5l3ruvcvr43mu24cpqqxlj9jf

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Author Public Key

npub18rv2g0z2y40y77cx2zhvyulsrk4yqpdfawqeflz8cesc8trhc4tstx74cc

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Last Notes

2026-07-31 22:28:25 GMT

To celebrate the release of Spider-Man: Brand New Day, tonight's Low Quality Ad is for this Spider-Man Body Wash. I don't know about the rest of you, but I walked out of the theater thinking "What a hero. I need to smell like him."
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0C9RW7RKY?ref=t_ac_view_request_product_image&campaignId=amzn1.campaign.2XIUFNUXIYE18&linkCode=tr1&tag=connorstone06-20&linkId=amzn1.campaign.2XIUFNUXIYE18_1785514750213
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/117/016/893/632/789/570/original/7664825a096d05a3.jpg

2026-07-03 21:25:48 GMT

Today's Low Quality Ad is for this Pirate Cutting Board. All things considered, he's lucky he's only missing a leg.
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0C1GZXN23?ref=t_ac_view_request_product_image&campaignId=amzn1.campaign.2LRW2GZL7YC3T&linkCode=tr1&tag=connorstone06-20&linkId=amzn1.campaign.2LRW2GZL7YC3T_1783106642700
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/116/858/155/366/611/678/original/401134d4969a58af.jpg

2026-07-03 04:02:45 GMT

Tonight's Low Quality Ad is for this Cordless Hedge Trimmer, on sale for 35% off.
Do you hate hedges? Did hedges murder your father? Maim your mother? Humiliate your uncle? Finally get your long-awaited revenge by trimming them a bit.
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B079KVRS9W?ref=t_ac_view_request_product_image&campaignId=amzn1.campaign.91H1YYCVAD6A&linkCode=tr1&tag=connorstone06-20&linkId=amzn1.campaign.91H1YYCVAD6A_1783048705165
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/116/854/053/387/862/976/original/6ab9c2c7573f3b7e.jpg

2026-07-02 04:03:18 GMT

Tonight's Low Quality Ad is for this Cat Scratching Post. Your cats will scratch this tree instead of your couch! Just kidding, your cats will scratch whatever the hell they feel like and there's nothing you can do about it. I think they'll still enjoy this though.
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0FZJJTNCL?ref=t_ac_view_request_product_image&campaignId=amzn1.campaign.2QAMFK0D6H34S&linkCode=tr1&tag=connorstone06-20&linkId=amzn1.campaign.2QAMFK0D6H34S_1782956473372
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/116/848/393/078/614/607/original/15308f6ea3435be7.jpg

2026-07-01 04:09:06 GMT

Tonight's late night Low Quality Ad is for this Umbrella Phone Clip. Fellas, take notes. Women aren't attracted to muscles or nice cars or money. They don't even care about your personality. Women are only attracted to guys with tiny umbrellas on their phones.
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0H5WGHDPH?ref=t_ac_view_request_product_image&campaignId=amzn1.campaign.3GNJDBSDACAZ6&linkCode=tr1&tag=connorstone06-20&linkId=amzn1.campaign.3GNJDBSDACAZ6_1782873154288
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/116/842/753/527/512/606/original/c777388656f0de89.jpg

2026-06-29 04:05:55 GMT

Wow, that's a lot of calories.
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/116/831/229/131/101/816/original/d2ed04b2421cf655.jpg

2026-06-26 04:02:48 GMT

Tonight's Low Quality Ad is for the Philips Sonicare 5950 Electric Toothbrush, on sale for 47% off.
It gently removes 1,000% more plaque, which makes me ask "Jesus Christ, how much plaque do we have on our wretched teeth?".
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0GQW7WKGN?ref=t_ac_view_request_product_image&campaignId=amzn1.campaign.1X5TJBKDMFVG8&linkCode=tr1&tag=connorstone06-20&linkId=amzn1.campaign.1X5TJBKDMFVG8_1782442820250
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/116/814/404/820/053/031/original/fc4a200ab3b888cd.jpg

2026-06-23 04:13:11 GMT

Tonight's Low Quality Ad is for Fresh Step Advanced Odor Shield Cat Litter. I order these for my best friend all the time. He doesn't have a cat, but the boxes are heavy and he really hates his local Amazon driver.
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B089PM6FRC?ref=t_ac_view_request_product_image&campaignId=amzn1.campaign.38OJICED3GX5N&linkCode=tr1&tag=connorstone06-20&linkId=amzn1.campaign.38OJICED3GX5N_1782186071263
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/116/797/471/500/385/503/original/72915542ff2ae191.jpg

2026-06-22 19:05:44 GMT

Today's Low Quality Ad is for the Tribit Bluetooth Shower Speaker. True audiophiles know the shower is the optimal place to listen to music. Sound reflects off the water droplets to create a more atmospheric effect, and the vocals are purified by the hot steam.
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0FQJR6RTS?ref=t_ac_view_request_product_image&campaignId=amzn1.campaign.1CD8T4XNP8VH8&linkCode=tr1&tag=connorstone06-20&linkId=amzn1.campaign.1CD8T4XNP8VH8_1782151881471
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/116/795/316/589/066/880/original/abafb151c801d070.jpg

2026-06-22 13:32:03 GMT

This morning's Low Quality Ad is for this Anxiety Pin. This is proof that everything looks cooler when written in heavy metal font. I would strongly advise you to use it for your resume.
https://collabs.shop/h0h9pz
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/116/793/926/909/326/223/original/d5551f1d9119828f.jpg

2026-06-21 23:45:29 GMT

This evening's Low Quality Ad is for this Human Organ Lunch Box. It's a great way to prevent your coworkers from stealing your lunch. And if your lunch still gets stolen, then it's a great way to find out which coworker is the office cannibal.
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B007M2OHEY?ref=t_ac_view_request_product_image&campaignId=amzn1.campaign.13IC4U05CE55F&linkCode=tr1&tag=connorstone06-20&linkId=amzn1.campaign.13IC4U05CE55F_1782082988220
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/116/790/597/105/950/251/original/ed1dfd51b914b1cb.jpg

2026-06-20 06:25:55 GMT

Legally speaking, I am not supposed to tell you that you can use tonight's Low Quality Ad, this garment steamer, to steam your enemies into oblivion. I am not supposed to tell you how much they will fear your steamy wrath.
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0DJ2XVNX6?ref=t_ac_view_request_product_image&campaignId=amzn1.campaign.14ZWFMFFRPDCH&linkCode=tr1&tag=connorstone06-20&linkId=amzn1.campaign.14ZWFMFFRPDCH_1781936691957
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/116/780/996/572/200/235/original/c794fce394c8fdec.jpg

2026-06-16 15:41:48 GMT

Today's Low Quality Ad is for this Roly-Poly Pin. What's that you say, you hate bugs? Wrong. No you don't. Not all bugs. You don't hate the roly-poly bug. You love the roly-poly bug. Everyone loves the roly-poly bug.
https://collabs.shop/ocr8ms
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/116/760/369/171/762/320/original/5557c90e9628f55f.jpg

2026-06-03 16:32:37 GMT

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Silver lining: Tomorrow might be worse, but at least it's not as bad as the next day will be.

2026-06-03 15:37:24 GMT

Today's Low Quality Ad is for this "It Gets Worse Before It Gets Worse" Patch. On the bright side, that means today is the best day of the rest of your life.
https://collabs.shop/3lg2pb
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/116/686/915/072/760/096/original/cf8046676482089f.jpg

2026-05-28 13:31:56 GMT

A Neo-Nazi is a Nazi who equally loves fascism and The Matrix.

2026-05-20 23:08:32 GMT

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In Hell they actually give you a laptop but it has 1990 era internet speeds.

2026-05-20 22:33:50 GMT

Tonight's Low Quality Ad is for this "Hell Is A Place On The Internet" Shirt. To be more accurate, I would argue that Hell is most places on the internet.
https://collabs.shop/upzyoh
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/116/609/279/724/070/125/original/fd1bec95a575c991.jpg

2026-05-18 16:16:47 GMT

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A lot of people have messaged me saying you should not put toasters in bathtubs. Okay, I don't want to even imagine how disgusting your filthy unhygienic toast must taste.

2026-05-18 15:39:04 GMT

Today's Low Quality Ad is for this Toaster Bath T-shirt. Finally, a shirt that promotes good hygiene. What's not to love?
https://collabs.shop/zsf0l5
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/116/596/325/262/638/953/original/ae6e1deb75845358.jpg

2026-05-17 15:03:48 GMT

Today's Low Quality Ad is for this Peanut Butter & Jellyfish Sandwich Pin. Just like the ones Mom used to make (my mother is absolutely demented).
https://collabs.shop/emothd
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/116/590/524/463/450/948/original/953ff0def3d9ca0f.jpg

2026-05-16 14:48:25 GMT

Today's Low Quality Ad is for this Yawning Kitty Blanket. If you do not comment "Big yawn!" when you see this blanket you will be blocked and reported immediately.
https://collabs.shop/m2ukdj
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/116/584/745/176/849/929/original/eef07b00f39e0fb1.jpg

2026-05-14 21:54:36 GMT

Tonight's Low Quality Ad is for this Narwhal Stuffed Animal. The Narwhal was nearly hunted to extinction in 1880 after Mark Twain jokingly suggested that the animal's horn could be used to cure illiteracy.
https://collabs.shop/bw2cox
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/116/575/074/750/813/011/original/32657b0b8440a029.jpg

2026-05-14 15:25:50 GMT

Look, I know you all think this account is funded by the possum industry. But that's not true. That's insane. I don't think possums even have an industry to promote. On an unrelated note, today's Low Quality Ad is for this Stay Trashy Hat.
https://collabs.shop/zoxcty
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/116/573/623/572/103/171/original/04362cc9cc1ef96d.jpg

2026-05-12 15:38:38 GMT

Today's Low Quality Ad is for this Eat The Rich Bracelet. This is unironically the best friendship bracelet I've ever seen. If you are wearing this I will want to be friends with you. I just hope it means we have similar values and not that you're a cannibal.
https://collabs.shop/owidnw
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/116/562/125/187/299/615/original/7ae5967163322b90.jpg

2026-05-07 15:42:25 GMT

I know that Stephen Miller gets a lot of hate on here, but hear me out.
I think we could hate him more. We have the capacity, we all just need to put in a little more effort.

2026-04-15 15:32:14 GMT

I was mistaken for a bot again, so here's a recent picture of my fiancée and me in Rhode Island. You can be confident that we are humans because robots were banned from Rhode Island in 2011, after the incident.
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/116/409/407/171/418/710/original/596b277cc753c470.jpg

2026-04-15 04:08:26 GMT

Very suspicious.
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/116/406/753/685/257/260/original/b9497b8099c8ed79.jpg

2026-04-13 16:40:30 GMT

That makes sense.
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/116/398/358/786/664/453/original/72711391285c870e.jpg

2026-04-13 15:09:09 GMT

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Yes, you can also repost if you are currently serving on the Crustacean Committee.

2026-04-13 14:36:54 GMT

Today's Low Quality Ad is for this Detritus Pin. Please boost if you're a proud member of the Crab Club. I'm trying to find my people on here.
https://collabs.shop/el4iiy
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/116/397/687/919/501/780/original/36ef9bc170ab1ecb.jpg

2026-04-10 13:46:42 GMT

Smart.
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/116/380/716/073/938/040/original/a03b91b16c4af809.jpg

2026-03-21 16:57:27 GMT

This will come as bad news to some people.
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/116/268/016/665/184/252/original/f303fb4850a4bb98.jpg

2026-03-04 18:02:14 GMT

A true artistic genius.
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/116/171/996/941/534/320/original/7fc500d3fda3cc05.jpg

2026-02-26 05:17:18 GMT

Uh oh.
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/116/135/233/580/088/960/original/1950fa07a2b811f9.jpg

2026-02-11 17:00:03 GMT

Today's Low Quality Ad is for this Everything's Computer Pin. Go ahead and try to name one thing that's not computer. I dare you.
https://collabs.shop/lf5d6j
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/116/053/034/903/787/689/original/fa12aac308e69a85.jpg

2026-02-09 23:18:52 GMT

Tonight's Low Quality Ad is for this Kodama Coffee Mug.
Kodama are spirits from Japanese folklore that act as guardians of the forest. It's probably for the best they don't exist, because if they did there is a 99% chance kodama nuggets would be on fast food menus.
https://collabs.shop/emvv0s
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/116/043/119/287/043/966/original/6a237737b14e818e.jpg

2026-02-04 17:43:29 GMT

Common advice: If you want to be successful, make sure to carefully proofread your emails and speak in a professional manner.
Every single email from the richest people on the planet:
"jeffrey.. Thank u for crzy party. Loved the hotdoggs. Lets talk biznss ideas. Maybe make monies tgthr???"

2026-01-31 16:01:38 GMT

I saw Florence & The Machine play last night. Embarrassed to admit I didn't know she performs with an actual machine. I always figured it was just the name of the band. Great concert though, lots of beeps and boops. My favorite part was when the machine started loudly screeching "DEATH TO HUMANS!"

2026-01-10 17:47:50 GMT

I'm sick of people talking about nothing but corrupt politicians and fascism and capitalist greed on here, so today's Low Quality Ad is for this Guillotine Pin. I'm not sure what a guillotine does actually. The red stuff makes me think it's used to slice pomegranates.
https://collabs.shop/toeukb
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/871/812/131/028/698/original/98d94634e89cdce2.png

2026-01-06 13:26:53 GMT

Shame on him!
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/848/380/028/921/083/original/54501a520e95231c.jpg

2026-01-06 01:20:17 GMT

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Being a professional disappointment sounds bad until you realize it insinuates that you'd get paid to disappoint people.

2026-01-06 00:46:13 GMT

Tonight's Low Quality Ad is for this Professional Disappointment shirt. As an amateur disappointment I am extremely jealous of anyone that gets to wear this.
https://collabs.shop/sy1uhb
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/845/379/029/982/204/original/d6051455d213ef86.jpg

2026-01-05 23:20:47 GMT

I wonder what's going on then.
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/845/053/305/537/744/original/5f2305c1adce03b7.jpg

2026-01-05 22:09:06 GMT

Poor Brian.
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/844/535/531/363/340/original/7665329b774e01e5.jpg

2026-01-05 20:00:22 GMT

Nature is crazy.
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/844/033/496/262/698/original/5c9550de73a4e34d.jpg

2026-01-05 18:23:46 GMT

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Big fan of how you think this dragon has a mustache until you realize it's actually sideburns, and then you realize he has sideburns AND a mustache.

2026-01-05 17:50:06 GMT

2026 is the year of the horse. But dragons are objectively cooler, so today's Low Quality Ad is for this Chinese Dragon Stuffed Animal. Not only could a dragon devour a horse in one mighty bite, but it would also destroy any racehorse in the Kentucky Derby.
https://collabs.shop/eapcrr
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/843/745/876/450/165/original/0ec518ffa545fc11.jpg

2026-01-05 16:46:18 GMT

It's a great month.
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/843/290/329/352/662/original/fb56c89d72fdcfb8.jpg

2026-01-05 13:27:50 GMT

I have personally rescued thousands of ants.
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/842/721/123/807/662/original/ed30d5137e007903.jpg

2026-01-05 01:54:57 GMT

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They might be carrot scented. I'm not sure. I sniffed it for five minutes straight before I realized I do not know what a carrot smells like.

2026-01-05 01:23:50 GMT

Tonight's Low Quality Ad is for these Carrot Candles. Have you ever tried to burn a carrot and been disappointed by how not flammable it is? I never have. That would be a weird thing to be disappointed by. Anyway, these candles are neat.
https://collabs.shop/bcbrki
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/839/867/028/770/715/original/0203553a10693761.jpg

2026-01-05 00:02:01 GMT

How exciting.
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/839/553/366/374/799/original/1c976fa08ffd7c88.jpg

2026-01-04 22:56:28 GMT

RE: https://mstdn.social/@lowqualityfacts/115793165697461655
Someone ordered 18 of these. If this was you, please tell me. I have so many questions. Do you just really love raccoons? Were they all for you? Are you in charge of a racoon fan club and wanted to get all 18 members a token of your appreciation? I need to know more about your life.
#note19s8…sddr

2026-01-04 21:45:08 GMT

We made a comic about a carnival.
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/839/015/462/133/160/original/ea43fe619caa747c.jpg

2026-01-04 20:36:34 GMT

That blows my mind.
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/838/612/956/021/986/original/1ff669d62d3f677d.jpg

2026-01-04 18:56:53 GMT

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I'm not even just out of last fuck papers, I lost the entire jar.

2026-01-04 18:19:49 GMT

Today's Low Quality Ad is for this "My Last Fuck" pin. Congratulations if you still have one left to give. Personally, I lost my last one in 2002 when they canceled Firefly.
https://collabs.shop/jnzfhi
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/837/985/213/302/363/original/5d3306bdba1b5ff4.jpg

2026-01-04 17:14:55 GMT

RIP.
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/837/740/930/505/486/original/9784b975fb73cd86.jpg

2026-01-04 13:33:19 GMT

I'm surprised that so many people don't know this.
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/835/211/704/315/349/original/e991ecd7235f256b.jpg

2026-01-04 04:08:09 GMT

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I do indeed, I hope you enjoy them!

2026-01-04 03:57:30 GMT

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My father always called krill a poor man's shrimp. Harsh.

2026-01-04 03:04:04 GMT

Tonight's Low Quality Ad is for this Don't Krill My Vibe sticker. Unfortunately, a blue whale might krill his vibe when it suddenly eats him and 40 million of his friends in a single day.
https://collabs.shop/uejvtk
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/834/599/954/343/399/original/ec035102df92dba8.jpg

2026-01-04 01:45:24 GMT

Release the Cruise cut you cowards.
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/834/297/792/858/358/original/2bce78616ec18464.jpg

2026-01-03 22:44:52 GMT

LOVE ALWAYS WINS.
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/833/284/143/350/040/original/6c25ccec21314bbc.jpg

2026-01-03 21:14:46 GMT

Very honorable.
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/833/002/896/041/775/original/a5d77a3799d572da.jpg

2026-01-03 19:40:33 GMT

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I order curly fries and Kirby immediately sucks them up. He gleefully points at the no refunds sign.

2026-01-03 18:23:28 GMT

Welp, it already seems like social media is going to be as depressing as ever this year. So please take a moment just to enjoy today's Low Quality Ad. It is a Kirby's mug. Look, Kirby opened up his own Arby's. That's nice, right? Gave you a few seconds of happiness, eh?
https://collabs.shop/onxtzw
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/832/449/586/803/458/original/4fdc3ca04e8af56f.jpg

2026-01-03 17:22:12 GMT

It was originally a peaceful invention. Not to bread, obviously.
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/832/094/815/344/152/original/e2205660f2f5c0d6.jpg

2026-01-03 15:14:37 GMT

People keep assuming that we're invading Venezuela for oil, but let's also consider the possibility that Maduro said something like like "Trump Tower looks gaudy" 30 years ago and it has been eating away at Trump every day since.

2026-01-03 13:59:46 GMT

That's the most petty thing I've ever heard.
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/831/522/998/735/663/original/f3a2383bf0f77834.jpg

2026-01-03 01:42:27 GMT

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Don't even get me started on embroidery. Crocheters and knitters file a restraining order on any embroiderer they meet as a matter of principle.

2026-01-03 00:52:04 GMT

Tonight's Low Quality Ad is for this Anglerfish Crochet Kit. This is a crochet kit. It is not a knitting kit. It's an important distinction. You might think people who crochet and people who knit would get along, but you'd be wrong. They despise each other. They are sworn enemies.
https://collabs.shop/awyrtd
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/828/415/845/502/870/original/5cf0a1403dbeb013.jpg

2026-01-02 23:41:59 GMT

That is some impressive dedication.
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/828/149/135/069/395/original/6893727dc259ce27.jpg

2026-01-02 20:15:46 GMT

I love Willem Dafoe.
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/827/202/656/158/494/original/77c585be0d70c4f4.jpg

2026-01-02 19:11:35 GMT

We made a comic about mood rings.
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/827/086/939/824/605/original/1db9cc0e814921a6.jpg

2026-01-02 18:20:52 GMT

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Some self-described "zoologist" is trying to tell me a capybara is not an elephant. Sure, I bet you think an armadillo isn't a giant roly poly bug too.

2026-01-02 17:45:35 GMT

Today's Low Quality Ad is for this Capybara Blanket. You may have heard that the capybara is the world's largest rodent, but did you know that it is also the world's smallest species of elephant?
https://collabs.shop/qrewa3
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/826/679/508/193/239/original/b36dedacd4a8b30c.jpg

2026-01-02 16:41:49 GMT

Wow, I somehow never knew that.
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/826/449/650/893/005/original/282edfb3c4274941.jpg

2026-01-02 15:35:14 GMT

Please support my Patreon so I can earn enough money to purchase and delete the internet.
https://www.patreon.com/lowqualityfacts

2026-01-02 14:30:45 GMT

Some people have seemed confused about what my Low Quality Facts account is, so I made this graph to help you all understand it.
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/825/982/698/094/642/original/b3fa5354ea2ffa66.jpg

2026-01-02 13:19:47 GMT

That explains a lot.
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/823/879/816/898/693/original/50bc8f157ceea769.jpg

2026-01-02 02:43:04 GMT

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It is insane how many people have dm'd me to say option C is their New Year's Resolution.

2026-01-02 01:15:05 GMT

If your New Year's Resolution is to:
A. Get a cat
B. Spend more time with your cat
or
C. Read every Garfield comic strip ever written
then tonight's Low Quality Ad is the perfect shirt for you.
https://collabs.shop/vbbtbd
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/822/851/976/910/393/original/1f6cec1fba93eb60.jpg

2026-01-01 21:54:26 GMT

Better safe than sorry.
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/821/847/212/359/695/original/1ba53f03c669d14f.jpg

2026-01-01 20:19:15 GMT

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Good news: I have figured out how to order the illegally addictive fudge.
Bad news: I am now in jail.

2026-01-01 19:47:08 GMT

Today's Low Quality Ad is for Callie's Sweets Legally Addictive Fudge. The name implies that they also sell illegally addictive fudge, but I can't figure out what super secret promo code you need to enter to order that.
https://collabs.shop/r5uqig
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/821/318/369/586/534/original/e0bc4a5eef13bde9.png

2026-01-01 18:41:08 GMT

And he left the yo-yo there. You can see it with a good enough telescope.
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/821/083/253/741/436/original/2a29916cfc3d80aa.jpg

2026-01-01 17:39:49 GMT

Tough crowd.
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/820/648/670/750/149/original/f719d583f55059aa.jpg

2026-01-01 13:53:49 GMT

Dogs are too good.
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/818/904/557/435/861/original/b71179d97181e442.jpg

2026-01-01 00:51:46 GMT

Tonight's Low Quality Ad is for the Vlyme TripleShock. Who knows what dangers 2026 might bring? Bears. Nazis. Nazi bears. You can never be too prepared.
https://collabs.shop/7iv9fk
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/817/098/606/765/379/original/22dcba96486d2899.png

2025-12-31 23:37:05 GMT

It can't be done.
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/816/805/698/830/614/original/3354d342510e326d.jpg

2025-12-31 22:23:08 GMT

My New Year's Resolutions:
-Eat healthy
-Exercise
-Read more books
-Dismantle our chains of financial oppression by overthrowing our capitalist overlords, who leech off the backs of the working class like the parasites they are
-Play with my cats

2025-12-31 21:21:12 GMT

We made a comic about corporate activism.
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/816/271/999/094/940/original/549b3bcdb4d2c500.jpg

2025-12-31 20:17:21 GMT

Obviously.
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/815/822/473/983/588/original/cf82c59002c1ed95.jpg

2025-12-31 18:40:39 GMT

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Hopefully 2026 will be better, but at the rate things are going it could probably be summed up using the same pin with a few more exclamation marks.

2025-12-31 18:03:32 GMT

For New Year's Eve I wanted to find a Low Quality Ad that really encapsulates 2025. I think this pin does the trick.
https://collabs.shop/nnulu0
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/815/293/200/168/222/original/7d5f5ee0f12d8c41.jpg

2025-12-31 17:02:45 GMT

That's so inspirational.
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/814/973/301/556/568/original/71057e025bcf422b.jpg

2025-12-31 13:30:34 GMT

That's the most impressive thing I've ever heard.
https://media.mstdn.social/media_attachments/files/115/812/561/166/505/045/original/bd26d59dbdcc6c4d.jpg

2025-12-31 01:48:37 GMT

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In Mexico they refer to a regular Snickers bar as a churroless Snickers.