Purveyor of original comedy bronze humor - it’s a smaller niche market than comedy gold. I save some of my jokes for my own entertainment using #nerlingersjokes (yeah, I spelled it wrong but too lazy to fix it). I follow Philly sports. My hobbies are sitting in chairs, exploring various canned soups, and searching the refrigerator for wherever that smell is coming from.
Public Key
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2026-10-24T19:03:40Z Event JSON
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Last Notes npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II I feel tomatoes sliced about 1/2” or (12cm) thick make the best tomato sandwiches. npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II I’m thinking about creating a LinkedIn profile for my dog just because he looks so seriously professional in this one npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II As a US citizen, I’d like to say the crowd booing JD Vance at the Olympics makes me proud of the rest of the world 👍 npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II If you’re so scared of an unarmed civilian that your first instinct it to pull your weapon and point it in their face, then you’re too chickenshit to serve in any kind law enforcement agency, anywhere. That’s a fact. npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II I screwed up voting for pizza forgetting that I could get caffeine other ways 😕 npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II #memes #newyear npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II Who says we don’t tax #billionaires npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II Do you use the #Safeway App? npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II What if you promise not to accept any of their future job offers? npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II I’m thankful for a economy that’s so strong and robust that the government doesn’t even need to release economic data 😉 npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II On our heads? npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II Are these dances performed naked? Because otherwise the strip tease is the only correct answer npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II Remember when Howard Dean screamed with a hoarse throat and it was decided he was unfit to run for President because of that? Good times. npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II I was able to hack the DOJ’s #epsteinlist So let me know if there’s anyone you’d like me to add. npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II What? Strawberry milk is pink! npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II #maga npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II It’s called the Epstein Memorial Ballroom. It must be true because I saw it in another post npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II Did you ever miss a belt loop then walk around all day looking like you didn’t deserve pants? npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II #dogs #dogsofmastodon npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II Yes, I have a girlfriend, but she goes to a different instance npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II sponsorablepost npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II Future Taylor Swift hits: npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II I knocked over a lamp npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II https://beige.party/@Nerde/115272177456379552 npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II I had this dish in Vienna and on the menu it was called goulash. It took me years of failing to find the right recipe because it’s actually Hungarian beef paprikash. It’s supposed to be served with dumplings so I used gnocchi. npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II I’ve suspended the ABC News app on my phone indefinitely 👎 npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II Is it the one across the street from Starbucks? npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II Why no 3rd choice of a 3rd head? npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II In order to further vilify the shooter, they’ll say he was NOT on the Epstein List 😉 npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II BREAKING - The driverless autonomous ride share business is scrambling to keep up with #tesla after #ElonMusk latest innovation - placing a driver in the #tesla robo taxis npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II The Goudafather npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II If these are the stats out of the CDC, just imagine how bad it really is npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II I’m not sure what a vert is, but I’m pretty certain that I don’t need an extra one, so npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II Please boost. I’m doing a study of those of you that read my posts npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II The black one is probably the bass npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II I’m pretty sure Alice is a bot and that last picture is AI. There’s no way “Alice’s” arm could bend nearly 180 degrees below the elbow to hold up that 1 finger npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II That feeling someone is watching your every move 🤔 npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II 😂👍 npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II No one can say the Putin Leadership Template isn’t a wildly successful way to stay in power npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II Choose One and Boost Please npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II Fukushima? npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II I’m sure you’ve heard banks were flagging his transactions as suspicious, but nothing ever came of it, which sounds like what the government does for an informant npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II That was so bad I had to boost it so others can groan 😂 npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II And still failing to meet the urgency of the moment. So what are we to vote FOR when they’re satisfied with us simply voting against npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II For those living in the United States - are you: npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II I invented a Time Machine, but it takes the entire day to go 1 day into the future. npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II ‘‘Tis the season indeed. We had to get a new one last month. We got it online and under the model name it said “over 14,000 sold in the past week.” I’m assuming that was nationwide, but still that is just one model in one week by one chain of stores? 🤯 npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II #Texas flash flood warning system npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II As I was voting my dog started licking where his balls used to be 😂 npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II I’m thinking a cop in a very small town where nothing happens, like Mayberry. You just have to lock up the town drunk every weekend npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II Except fires in very hot or very cold weather, inhaling toxic fumes wearing cancer causing fire gear (they have a very high rate of cancer). 😬 npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II Is there something wrong with that? 🤨 npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II Our dogs always open the gates if they’re not locked. Do these 2 look “clever” to you? 😂 npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II Except for his npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II Also Toro npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II Doh! npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II OK. I’m going to need everyone here to sign an NDA npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II Ethel and Earnest singing “I Got You Babe” npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II The horror! npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II Are 2 clouds acceptable? npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II Milkshake NFTs 😉 npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II Who Let The Hot Dogs Out npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II I assure myself they are no match for my superior intellect, as I make a fifth attempt at creating an economical escape proof dog pen for the pups npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II #maga npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II All of them, eh? npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II 😳 npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II The #Chicago #Whitesox are 3-1 since the new Pope. Just saying npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II By all means, feel free to stop at the bottom of the escalator and decide what you’re going to do next, I’ll just jog backwards in place until you’re done with your Mitch McConnell minute. npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II I think they better cough up some more cash if they want their kids to have better grades 😉 npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II It’s both Teacher Appreciation Week and National Nurses’ Week and I think there’s going to be a fight npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II They’re “tough on crime”, but only when it’s crimes they haven’t committed npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II What’s the opposite of the Renaissance, because I think that’s the era we’re all in. npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II My hobbies are sitting in chairs, exploring various canned soups and searching the refrigerator for where that smell is coming from. npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II And it doubles as a shoe polish! npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II And its on Fox, right? npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II I don’t think it’s right that God allows some people to eat pork and not others npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II I suffered for years. Ice works best. Also I didn’t know this but lower back pain is often caused by tightness in hip and buttocks muscles. I often do hip and hamstring stretches which relieves a lot of the pain. Good luck 👍 npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II For those of us that support the sciences, to start the day today I’d like to single out the geologists and say, if you’re about to rock, we salute you. 🫡 npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II Ace Hardware of Spades npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II You’re STILL with HIM? npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II Empathy is a weakness, unless it’s empathy for #maga #billionaires that aren’t making as much profit as they were before they implemented their very own #Project2025 😢 npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II You can’t blame Trump for this latest breach of national security, because when asked he said “I know nothing about that”. npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II I’ll bet if you ask him, none of them are npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II Can you deliver this package for me? 😉 npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II I’m in. How much money do you need? npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II So it has shoulder straps? 🤔 npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II Maybe there are billionaires in Canada that also need to be freed from taxation? npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II I emailed Neil Tyson Degrasse asking him if lasagna crosses the event horizon of a black hole does it become spaghetti? npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II Also, they openly support Project 2025 npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II You get a tariff! And you get a tariff! Everybody gets a tariff! npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II Exactly. None of this goes away with #Trump. The cult of personality will be lost, but they’ll find another, which is exactly what #ElonMusk has been positioning himself to inherit for years. He saw what Trump has and he wants that for himself. npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II I bet #mattgaetz is feeling double crossed with #trump welcoming Tristan and #AndrewTate to the USA 🤷 npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II You’d think a felony conviction would have done already 🤷 npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II Mold Time Rock and Roll - Bob Seger npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II Caramel Knowledge npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II #satire #ElonMusk npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II I drink a provolone npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II They have a Starbucks in Babylon? npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II Attention - All parents dropping their children off at middle school - do not allow your child to exit your car until you’re at exactly the closet point to the gate. Who knows what could happen if your child has to walk that extra 5 to 10 feet if you don’t. Everyone behind you in a hurry to get to work is happy to wait for you. npub1hn6xunm2zz7dnytrmj2xn4m6vuwmf02e6ppu2urf65lsv4cycv0szenth0 Stanley Nerdlinger II They’ve all blocked me
