Pretty much just my shower thoughts šæš§ But I do other things like... Developer Advocate at Lightning Labs | Co-Organizer of San Juan Bitdevs | Founder of Velas Commerce
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npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst Profile Code
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2026-06-27T14:01:40Z Event JSON
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Last Notes npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose That filters don't work and that clearly this fork wasn't going to work either. npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose Rage bait or food for thought? Both, of course. https://blossom.primal.net/90383306529b695f2742d1cd2dca80d37b2c568af86e6cfcbb9c7f8eea9f16c4.jpg npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose Look, you want to go & make sure all your stuff is up to date & expect to have to do some emergency updates soon. But this isnāt just the Bitcoin world. Anyone running any kind of relevant software is busy frantically patching things. We are in a strange moment right now. npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose seems to be. But we need to wait for the dust to settle. npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose Pavol Rusnak's recent Twitter article - Bitcoin Toxic Maximalism Has Failed "Good people attract good people. If you build a community around hating something, you attract people who hate." https://x.com/PavolRusnak/status/2084645616932606300 https://xcancel.com/i/article/2084645616932606300 npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose You think that's something Jesus would have done? npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose ...is this what you sit up at night worrying about? npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose šÆ npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose Pretty much every Bitcoiner I know has a story about losing funds. Iām unaffected by this latest disaster, but Iāve lost funds in other mishaps. We all have. If this one affects you, I want to tell you that money really isnāt all that important. Which may sound insane when youāre staring at a zero balance with that pit in your stomach. And itās also a strange thing for a Bitcoiner, with a degree in economics, to say. But, more accurately, I want to tell you that the accumulation of personal wealth is not very relevant to living a good or happy life. Now how money functions, the type of money that the world uses, that is very impactful. I donāt work in Bitcoin to stack sats, or build a citadel, or to drive a lambo, I do this work to separate money from state, to remove a giant concentration of power from the world. And having meaningful work in my life does make me a happier person. Where you spend your time and energy is wildly important, but wealth, the accumulation of stuff, is a different beast entirely. If this one affects you, I want to shake you and yell at you⦠WEALTH DOES NOT MAKE YOU A BETTER OR HAPPIER PERSON. Please believe me, I checked! ...a few times. Iāve been lucky enough to have seen this issue from many different angles. I grew up in a household that had some wild swings in income. One year a trailer in Florida, one year a month long vacation in Europe. Iāve lived in a roach filled studio apartment on the wrong side of town, and in a house so big you might get lost. Iāve lived among the poors and partied with the super wealthy. One time my ex won the lottery and then fell into a depression. True story. Iāve got some experience with this one! So many of us grew up with the belief that money is how you measure personal value and worth. That understanding is deep in our bones. I believed that for a long time and I fought really hard to āget into the roomā, and then hated it there. Getting out of poverty will make you happy, but from there the more you climb that ladder, the more you find yourself in rooms filled with people absolutely desperate to prove themselves via money. People who have lost their soul. That is not winning. The accumulation of wealth is not an interesting or valuable goal in life. You canāt take the money with you. You canāt take the Twitter follower count with you. You canāt take the perfectly decorated giant house with you. You do take your story with you. And your story just got a wild new chapter. Welcome to the club. npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose Good times/bad times donāt make someoneās character, they reveal it. Re this Coldcard disaster, itās been very interesting to see who is using this to dunk on others, who is trying to CYA, who is using this to gain new customers, and who is simply helping. Noted. npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose https://blossom.primal.net/aac44aac95c3b89a27dc354f6eb6935ee17fc4542250159231db95c11d1dab37.jpg npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose There is this culture that permeates the States. This view of the world, the idea that life is a competition, a race⦠a zerosum hierarchy. Itās so baked in itās hidden in phrases, in assumptions, in advertising, everywhere. The comparison is rampant. That person has a better job, a bigger car, went on a nicer vacation, has bigger boobs, their kids are more āsuccessfulā, #winning. Living the dream! When Iāve been spending time in the States it starts to seep in. The comparison emerges, the anxiety crawls back into the pit in my stomach, the joy starts to drip out of my life. When I leave again I have to detox to coax the peace and curiosity back into my life. npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose Do have bodily autonomy npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose ...the Texas police? npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose https://blossom.primal.net/ab563bd903384ed6860895915911dd6ae49113f332d35aeb10048523f9b14da9.jpg npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose https://blossom.primal.net/8b24e9574f2d40005acaa64f1a0c60d87204fd4dd59f39d1ba98c5d98e1065c4.jpg npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose https://blossom.primal.net/34e8c7e82d667eefb9fb48f48cabb2453fd960046f07f86877dd048c80d96287.jpg npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose I gotta admin, Trump makes me feel less bad about having voted for Bush... at least I didn't vote for Trump! This mess isn't my fault!!! š¤£š„ https://blossom.primal.net/889e60ef8077f538caeb58d931572c05d751201396da7c31192da45edb9d79c3.jpg npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose https://blossom.primal.net/ac9ef4feb5a2ead931f684949d537f7127a5350169ad9b1a87dc1c0afe440224.png npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose https://blossom.primal.net/eefb3d9a0e9e8f377629b0e8980f7724f50eefb221dc682af684b47a000f3f60.jpg npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose https://blossom.primal.net/51301c240d8c1837d45c1ef728ad79ff0b7d455c1125b08c0a08e4c77dc73fad.jpg npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose Get good at conflict. Humans are a social species. The #1 predictor of health and happiness is the quality of your relationships. No two people on planet earth agree on everything. All relationships require managing differences. Avoiding an argument doesnāt keep the peace it keeps the tension. The strength of a relationship is in the repair. Get good at conflict. Your health and happiness depend on it. npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose Sometimes š„ npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose https://blossom.primal.net/cdb4bc462f7d0356ca45998d06251627bea8c8a87bb29cd164337ce5fcf08af9.jpg npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose https://blossom.primal.net/37df1c502cd0f6d1400f9d4f5cf35a40b56e5a7108443bec6551ed2dc2ebbbef.jpg npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose I just spend a half hour explaining Wavelength to my Spanish tutor Ā”En espaƱol, por supuesto! She looked a bit overwhelmed 𤣠which is good news, I now speak Spanish well enough to overwhelm people with my nerdy enthusiasm in two different languages! npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose Iāve been working with Bitcoin payments since before Lightning was a thing. My personal motivation has always been to make better money, money that brings real utility to real people, and money that real people can use. For 14 years now Iāve always felt that we are just āa few yearsā away⦠just a few more years. But now, with this, with Wavelength, I think itās finally happened. Weāre ready. Wavelength is a toolkit for adding self-custodial bitcoin (and stablecoin) payments to any application. It takes everything hard about integrating bitcoin and turns it into a few simple API calls, so any developer, vibe coder, or agent can give their app a working bitcoin wallet without learning how Lightning works under the hood. Check out the blog post and ping me with questions! https://lightning.engineering/posts/2026-07-21-wavelength-launch/ npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose https://blossom.primal.net/4970bf8840cd034547bf76d724cbaa7038dbf8ac730648c29d7f2fa35d2d6cd9.jpg npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose https://blossom.primal.net/ceedd95711b47e0bb3f2b17380ef21fbe6e4cf60a69d98de513b8a77db0c07e0.jpg npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose nailed it šÆ npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose For a few of them it was a good decade since I'd last been in the same room with them. npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose BIP110 is a study in social contagion. But if youāre not a supporter, donāt go congratulating yourself just yet. Humans exist in a state of perpetual social contagion. You, yes you, are caught in a few yourself. And if you donāt know which types youāre susceptible too, and in which ways your mind is warped by the egregore⦠lo siento, you got it bad. npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose I keep hearing the Freud was a pedo and not really, it's complex. So Freud was a psychiatrist when that field was very new. His big breakthrough work came when he decided to study the phenomenon of "hysteria" which was effecting young women in Austria. He invented a sort of talk therapy and after spending month and months listening to these women he discovered that quite a lot of them had been sexually abused by older male relatives and that listening to these women and believing them and helping them worked wonders in eliminating their āhysteriaā. He published his findings and the results of his very successful therapy and became well known for this. ...but there was a problem. He was a part of high society in Vienna and he was treating a lot of young women from high society families in Vienna. Long story short, his findings implicated his neighbors and they didnāt like that. After some pressure from his high society friends he came up with an adaptation to his theories. All these young women that reported sexual abuse, well that wasnāt real because of course they were just fantasies. You see all young people fantasize about sexual interaction with their parents. Itās just a part of human nature. No one was actually abusing anyone, it was all just fantasy. And so he was let back into Vienna high society. So Freud wasnāt so much a pedo as a sell out that enabled pedos and prevented justice so that he could keep his social status. Not sure if thatās better or worse, but now you know! npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose I've been back in Chicago visiting with friends and family and went to an old friend's birthday party and it messed with my head a bit. Hanging out with people that you've known for 20-30 years is a trip. The perspective change is wild. Same place, same people, different time, different set of eyes. npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose Itās weird how people have such disrespect for and try to avoid the āsoft skillā of relationship management. I wrote out my todo list for this week and 100% of my urgent tasks, and 60% of my overall tasks are all relationship management. Even when you work in tech, you canāt get away from humans. Sooner or later you are always going to have to get good at managing relationships with real and complex humans. npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose Is spam bad? Well sure. Is hate speech bad? Ya! The issue is: who gets to decide when something is or isnāt across the line? Humans love nice simple rules. Good guys vs bad guys, nice clear lines in the sand. But thatās just not how reality works, from abortion to telling your partner white lies, there isnāt a simple easy rule to follow. Lo siento. npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose already did! npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose bound? No. But self concept is density... so npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose This is one of the most disgusting things one human can say to another. This says I don't give a shit about who you are, I don't give a shit about your dreams, I don't give a shit about your accomplishments. All I care about is how you can service me. Absolute fucking trash. https://blossom.primal.net/11d1c1b2c63ba92d238053ed03afc12cb1503cf96a70a69fc2682f01491142a6.png npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose One of the tragedies of our current patriarchy hangover is that most men have no idea how wanted they are. Men are still being taught to get their sense of value from logistical utility, and most women have been taught to feel intense amounts of shame for any sexual desires. The mix of these two things means that women generally don't express desires out loud and men rarely think of themselves as desirable. This is changing, but currently, most men donāt know how to be wanted, they only know how to be needed. And so they panic when they donāt have a sense of being logistically needed. Dudes, stop it. Youāre a bunch of hotties, act like it! š npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose stop being a slave. npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose https://blossom.primal.net/d8095cef6ca4395299684d88a1472a0df947923c29b14560ec46226dd224ee75.jpg npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose https://blossom.primal.net/4f894cf8df918847d7bd9b9baa97f0ce4cf488c16785ef9471309250d6c3be7f.jpg npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose Did you know that Mozart had an equally talented sister? npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose For the past few thousand years in western history, the majority of those recorded as brilliant minds were wealthy white men simply because they were the ones who had the luxury of studying and tinkering. https://blossom.primal.net/b3dd488d2e34bd393a006aaf15ccd6f62c2168a196e8506c5e466f6d0c50222b.jpg npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose well lets change that! npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose https://blossom.primal.net/dc925ccf3ce5f2b80e1ef342318666d39d13ec6ce79f7a97523f703bd9c34bbc.jpg npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose https://blossom.primal.net/bd9f0a847d2e01cc206c90c5f7729e55599ef2fc2fc0186895969ce279dcebc4.jpg npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose The rise of Christian nationalism terrifies me. I was born into a Christian fundamentalist cult. And of course Christian fundamentalism and Christian nationalism aren't the same things, but there is a lot of overlap there. Intense Christianity is a lot like extremist Islam. Hierarchical, patriarchal, racist, brutal. An ideology of obedience and punishment. Thankfully we left that cult when I was 7. If we had stayed I would have been married off as a teenager and had lots of kids very young. I would have grown up and been miserable but unable to leave as no way could I abandon my children. I would have hung myself off a tree branch in the back yard, as a number of my peers in that community did. I don't want that life for anyone. It is a tragedy. npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose O fuck, you're like a proper sociopath! So š and stay the hell away from me. npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose The US is great in many, many ways because it has āInclusive institutionsā. And yes, there are so, so many examples of systematic exclusion happening in the States, but, unfortunately, nearly everywhere else has even less inclusive institutions, and so by comparison we are kicking ass! Why Nations Fail: The Origins of Power, Prosperity, and Poverty is one of the best books Iāve ever read. It walks through, in painstaking detail, and with a flood of data points why some nation prosper, and why some fail. Spoiler, a nation with extractive institutions will fail to prosper. The US was founded on some great principals including balance of power, and because of that the citizens of the US have often been involved and included both politically and economically and that is why we have done as well as we have. npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose Facts don't care about your feelings. Atrocities happened and you need to look reality in the eye. npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose O look another atrocity apologist. ...truly grotesque. npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose Itās the 4th of July š and our 250th birthday š„³ and so people keep asking me if Iām feeling patriotic⦠and no, no Iām not. Now before you accuse me of hating my country⦠I kinda do! But also kinda donāt. You see just having been born in the US gave me access to more money, and more opportunity than nearly 99% of the rest of humanity. I was born in the global elite. I am wildly lucky to be an American! But here is the thing, Iām mad at how much Iāve been misled. I was taught all about the founding fathers, and they certainly got the spirit of the thing right! āWe hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.ā šš Fuck ya! They nailed the vibe. ...but then interpreted āall menā to mean rich white European males. Ugh. Do you remember manifest destiny? I sure do. This was the idea that white Americans stealing land from and often killing Native Americans was totally fine, cuz that land was divinely ordained to belong to the white Americans. "our manifest destiny to overspread the continent allotted by Providence for the free development of our yearly multiplying millions." The story was taught to me with glory. We set out and conquered the wilderness and banished the savages! ...also known as theft and murder, which I later learned about as the āTrail of Tearsā. I was taught that yes slavery is wrong, but you know it wasnāt that bad, and we ended it ages ago, so all is well and forgiven now. I had this idea in my head that the slaves were generally just farm hands that couldnāt leave. They were given houses, and they raised families and had happy little lives. Later I learned about a number of diaries from slave owners or those on their plantations that contain detailed documentation of their systematic mistreatment of slaves, including notes on just how much abuse slave populations would withstand before potentially revolting. I wonāt repeat some of the stories from them here, they are as you might imagine just about as cruel and horrific as it is possible to be. And no doubt conditions were very different on different plantations, but with how many of these diaries we have, itās very clear that how horrific this phase of history was has been intentionally hidden. In my own lifetime weāve gone to all kinds of wars under the guise of āliberatingā others, or because it was totally necessary to protect ourselves from imminent danger, etc. And when you look closer and closer, it becomes abundantly clear that it was never about anything besides power. I have been consistently lied to about what this country has been and is. We were founded on some great principals. And that whole balance of power thing has really done wonders for us and taken us a long, long way. With those principles and with the political inclusion that we have had, weāve made a lot of progress! However, psychopaths gunna psycho and we seem to be good at enabling them. We are the evil empire. To this day the abusive elite are out here holding the positions of power in our country and directing thefts and murders of all sorts of varieties and they do it all with my tax dollars and in my name. And I feel pretty fucking gross about that. npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose Modern day motherhood is miserable and that's why fewer women are choosing it. If you want women to chose it, make it less miserable. Why is it miserable? Because we are doing it all wrong. One woman alone in a house with small children all day is torture. Thatās not how humans work. Humans are designed to live in a pack and raise children communally. If we want women to not be miserable raising kids, then we need to bring that community back. We need to take all that burden off them and share it around so that they can continue to be normal humans. If women have to give up all that they are to have kids, then a lot of them will chose not to have kids. npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose I don't want more humans, I think we have too much already. But for those who want to encourage more babies.... they are doing it all wrong! Sometimes I think the pro-natalism is just an excuse for subjugating women. https://blossom.primal.net/06cf13a477c5ca150d114c48d75f3168d4f6af2805aa38533b136c4dfe62991e.jpg npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose This morning I was out for a walk in the park and as I turned a corner I spotted an Iguana on the sidewalk up ahead. When it spotted me it freaked out a bit and scurried up a tree to get away from me. That bummed me out a bit. It was really cool looking and I wanted to get closer to it and maybe take a picture of it. But itās behavior was totally understandable. I am a lot bigger than it. Iām capable of harming it. And while I know that I have zero interest in doing that and only wanted to admire how cool it looks, that creature has no way of knowing that I mean it no harm. There are people in Puerto Rico that hunt and eat Iguanas and Iāve seen people attempt to run them over with their cars. So given the limited information that Iguana had about me personally, it was of course making the wise decision to run away from me. I did not take itās behavior as a personal insult. I did not declare that Iguanas are waging a cultural war against humanity, I did not shout āNot all humans!ā at the Iguana. I just gave it some space and went on with my day. npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose I rarely count calories, but when I do, I'm pretty sure I should be able to deduct 10% at the end of the day to account for all the bites I gave my dogs. npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose I think I've been to 20 different countries. Is that impressive or are those rookie numbers? npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose what variety of purity testing are you encountering? All the maxi stuff? npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose Based and woke are the same things. Not a fan of either. npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose ....is that a joke? npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose sure, one recent example is a post on Facebook that said "Ladies, if you were a man for a day, what would you do?" And I said "Go for a walk by myself at night." and that then kicked it off. Then I get all the "You're paranoid", "stop hating on men", "men have to deal with danger too", on and on. npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose The word really means dramatically different things to different people. And so I try not to use it. If I am going to use it a use a qualifier with it. I generally try to talk about things in terms of human rights and values. npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose One of my personal favorite quotes... "I myself have never been able to find out precisely what feminism is: I only know that people call me a feminist whenever I express sentiments that differentiate me from a doormat." I personally find that whenever I express the idea that women are independent creatures who exist for their own purposes a bunch of people will jump in the comments to call me "feminist" ... whatever that may mean to them. The word has been taken over by political madness. Best to avoid it all together. npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose Do you think women are people who have inherent rights? Those who are committed to their righteous anger will not see reason. Politics will bind people to their righteous anger. You will not see that you are caught in that trap for an long as your anger brings you comfort. npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose https://blossom.primal.net/1b3739265553f397f401d1121f60112208402445399bea4a33c8277f8f7679d4.jpg npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose Huh, no I haven't noticed that. Sometimes its the other way. For example el problema = "the problem" and is masculine lol But I don't know a lot of slang. What is an example? npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose Sometimes when someone says something atrocious Iāll call them on it and be like āthatās not coolā and then theyāll get all pissy and be like āwell youāre not any funā. And Iām just like, bro, do you not know how to have a good time with out doing some gay bashing? Is homophobia a prerequisite to your enjoyment? npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose https://blossom.primal.net/98231912d7599e43f4740bd12a0c139b3b2a1214877d4369f9397275a619954d.jpg npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose well thanks, but there will be lots of other stuff as well, cuz I'm a complete and complex human. npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose https://blossom.primal.net/6c63dce94e7adae720700c1021a08253f53b27d2b5cec4bc9f1db92e783b9e16.jpg npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose https://blossom.primal.net/22b4bef52eb33df54cc360bd97de7f28a82e0bf0c3275ee3830de4f9f7319149.jpg npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose Everyone wants to be seen, no one wants to do the work of seeing others. npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose Also, maybe you should just care about others you fucking psychopath! https://blossom.primal.net/6aa47d7e3c089904cb1af283e05b51c5c31d60748c0132c1f0cda61bd5e61125.jpg npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose so if they deny that the problem exists then they don't have to do the protecting and risk the consequences of that? npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose so ... men don't want to protect cuz they don't want to end up in jail? npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose https://blossom.primal.net/c5dda11e0e168a24b53b22c9764824666d8e1f98198b6e2cd9deb2a70c04e858.jpg npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose Netanyahu is a fucking monster. You gotta have some understanding for civilians who are caught up in fear and making poor choices to support this monster. npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose I love the idea of men as protectors, itās a task that they are generally well suited to. Men in general are taller, have more upper body strength, etc. And a very honorable thing to do with physical strength is to protect others. However, men actually doing protecting is pretty rare, at least in my life experience. The most common way that a man, who in theory wants to be a protector, fails to protect, is by not believing that there is a threat to protect from. I have known so many men in my life that Iām pretty sure are not predators themselves, and who in many areas of life are decent and reasonable people, that for some reason shut down on this topic. Unfortunately, being sexually assaulted is very much the norm for women in the world. It has certainly been my experience in life, and also the experience for nearly 100% of the women that I know. And itās not just anecdotal data here, there are just mountains and mountains of studies that all tell this story as well. The evidence is overwhelming. When I talk to these men about these things I do not accuse them personally of any wrong doing. I do not say ugly things about men in general. I do not advocate the removal of any rights from men. When I am talking to these men I am looking for understanding, but that seems to be the one thing they canāt give. They just shut down and go into defense mode and I donāt know why. So if you have any idea, please please tell me, why are there so many seemingly decent men out there who can not/will not see this reality? What is going on here? npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose https://blossom.primal.net/7b8bc14101b9c6c60ecece3806457635d215f97832d5496f522fde8820e6fac5.jpg npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose No, that's not what āReenactmentā or ārepetition compulsionā are or what I'm talking about here. If you want to talk about something else, okay, but don't intentionally misuse those terms. npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose I hate the phrase "nothing good happens after midnight." My dear, do you have any idea how many of the most amazing moments of my life happened after midnight!?!?! npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose https://blossom.primal.net/b235593e7db2b500a1c9c667cacfde1aa9da91f536cfeb4d535dfa394ec7a4db.png npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose This is also a reference to unpaid domestic labor. Dishwashing, laundry, cooking, cleaning, event planning, etc. etc. And we have to remember that just a few generations back this work was very difficult, no dish washing machine, no clothes washing machine, clothes were mended and washed by hand, a garden wasn't for flowers it was for food, food that then had to be canned, on and on. women and mothers have always been working women and mothers. npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose āReenactmentā or ārepetition compulsionā is the unconscious tendency to recreate circumstances, relationship dynamics, or emotional patterns that mirror past traumatic experiences. I first learned about this behavior pattern in the context of sexual assault trauma or romantic relationship dynamics, but I think it actually applies to quite a lot of things. For example, political debates. It often happens where someone is very aggressive in their stance while I am trying to deescalate and have a real conversation. I will perhaps find something to agree with them on but they will then mock me for that. And Iām just thinking, O, you donāt want understanding or agreement, you want a fight! You want to be angry and to yell at me! No doubt this person didnāt do a good job of standing up for themselves or their beliefs in some other time and place, and now they are attempting to correct that by reenacting that fight with me, and really sticking it to their opponent this time! Ya, thatās not much fun to be around. But once you see itā¦. npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose I don't like the collectivist language here. I didn't fight to get paid, at least not in this life, that happened well before my time. But I am so very grateful to the women that did fight to get paid, cuz yes, women and mothers have always worked. https://blossom.primal.net/7c8e9ab468916c1b88d503e7a1b3e808a561988d888f759eb0940eaa2004012b.jpg npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose Well not the men that I know. I know a man that used to be a body builder. At the height he very much looked like this picture. ...and he ate unseasoned chicken breast, and measured the exact amount of water he was allowed to drink each day, etc. etc. npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose the accuracy of your perception of me. npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose okay npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose What does the word "capitalism" mean to you? And I don't need a dictionary or text book definition here, I'm looking for the associations that the word holds for you. So let's do word association! When I say "capitalism", what 5 other words come to mind? npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose This is not what a man looks like. This is someone who has intentionally, with all consuming dedication, cartoonified themselves for the entertainment of others. No doubt itās impressive, and very eye catching! š But very likely, for most women, not really that attractive. This dude is no fun. This guy will not join you on a wild night out and do shots and then have tacos. This guy will make your child together cry on their 5th birthday when he refuses to eat a piece of the birthday cake. Youāll never see this guy as heās at the gym 3 hrs a day. Heās pretty miserable. Most women are going to want men that look like real men. https://blossom.primal.net/b68858a731a51b5bf45682e61d59531fc91916dae4f067652c69048d8eca7bb3.jpg npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose I think Israel should exist. I've met a lot of lovely Israelis and I support them. But maybe you are asking if I support Netanyahu or what the IDF is doing, or what I suspect mossad is doing. And the answer there is absolutely not. But at this point, you are clearly not someone who I wish to give my time to. so adiós. npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose For a while the BDSM scene has been confusing to me, and a bit concerning. But, after many books and conversations, I think I understand why this exists. But first, a few very important disclaimers: Consenting adults can do whatever the fuck they want in the bedroom. I am not trying to say that people shouldnāt do these things, or even that they are unhealthy things to do. There clearly seems to be some therapeutic benefit. And I am of course speaking in broad generalities here. Humans are complex, people do these things for a wide variety of reasons. So letās go with a typical setup here, a heterosexual pairing with a woman playing the sub role and a man playing the dom role. Alice and Bob. Alice was brought up in a time and place that taught her that womenās sexuality either didnāt exist, or was very shameful. Because of this sex and shame became fused in her head. Not at all helping this situation is her experiences with sexual abuse. Alice was sexually abused by a close male family member for a time during her adolescence. So not only are sex and shame fused in her head, she also has a hard time differentiating between sex, violence, and love. For her sex is difficult to experience without the themes of violence and shame and a power imbalance. When dealing with trauma people often do āreenactmentā where they attempt to recreate the stories, but this time with a different ending. Or sometimes they recreate in an attempt to process what happened and change their relationship to it. Alice seeks out interactions with BDSM doms and presents them with a list of her boundaries. A 3 page detailed list of things that are a hard no, things that are a soft no, and things that sheās comfortable with. This formality helps her to regain a sense of control over sexual interactions. Bob was an awkward and sensitive kid. His mother was erratic, at times manipulative or even abusive. She terrified him, he had no idea how to interact with her let alone connect to her. And as he entered adolescence this fear of his mother extended to women in general. Bob has generally not done very well with the ladies. He doesnāt know what to say or to do, he has no idea what they do or donāt want from him. He desperately wants them, but has no idea how to go about connecting with them. He feels as if he is a cocaine addict and women are people who unknowingly walk around all day with a briefcase of cocaine handcuffed to their wrist and ignore him. After a long dry spell Bob began to dabble in the BDSM world. He seeks out women to play the sub role. The formality of these relationships gives him some clarity in a situation that otherwise baffles him. And playing the dom role gives him a sense of control over an act whose absence has felt like constant humiliation. A BDSM interaction gives them both space to work through these things. npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose All of them are? Am I causing genocide? npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose The internet can be an ugly place. Sometimes I'm scrolling and its all just... "XYZ is all the fault of women!" "ABC is caused by the Jews!" On and on. Sometimes it gets to me, but sometimes it's wildly flattering. Don't know if you knew, but apparently, I run the world š
⨠npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose If you want to convince someone of something, you have to give them a way to think of themselves as the hero. And when someone hands you a villain to hate and tells you that you need to be heroic in fighting against them... pause for a moment, you might be being manipulated. npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose So what's your answer? npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose Sure, but humans are complex. The same person, in the span of 5 mins, can swing between curiosity and wanting to be right. I'd argue that being very good at conflict resolution means encouraging the other party to stay in a curious state. npub1tv5j2h2742ht2a6490cdzypsxah5wlge5qyutadgphw884ynt8mqg4jlst hmichellerose the aim is understanding and reaching a mutual agreement on what to do about the conflict.