Michael Vilain

recovering sysadmin
Certified Advanced Rolfer™

Alternate Mastodon: Michael Vilain (npub1wdj…scqn)
Twitter: [nobody goes there any more...it's to crowded]
Rolfing™ Home page: https://www.vilain.com/wp

Public Key

npub1r3q5gn8rkryrlw5hp4n76gv9v4280k9ztz7jhgae2760dkpwsgnspe4fz6

NIP-05 Address

[email protected]

Profile Code

nprofile1qqspcs2yfn3mpjplh2ts6eldyxzk24rhmz3930ft5wu40d8kmqhgyfcpz3mhxue69uhhyetvv9ujuerpd46hxtnfduqs6amnwvaz7tmwdaejumr0dswf6tem

Publishing to

relay.damus.io

nos.lol

Author Public Key

npub1r3q5gn8rkryrlw5hp4n76gv9v4280k9ztz7jhgae2760dkpwsgnspe4fz6

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Last Notes

2026-05-18 06:16:10 GMT

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As much as Alton Brown kvetches about unitaskers in the kitchen, I think he'd give a breast pump a pass. And maybe even a burr grinder for coffee.

2026-05-09 22:35:13 GMT

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On the plus side, it sparked a discussion paint finish from a number of friends. A neighbor is just gaga for "matte" finish. Another told me that satin for walls wears better and gives more depth. I thought my contractor would just be buying the same white paint for everything, but nope. Multiple finishes. Last time I painted was 30 years ago, so this is all new to me.

2026-05-09 18:43:58 GMT

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When I saw it, I told the designer "Yeah, I like cats. But that's way more than a "pop" of color."

2026-05-09 18:41:33 GMT

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A client's dog kept doing this during a session. I asked her "Can you imagine what it would be like if Charlie was Brazilian and shook with a samba rhythm?"

2026-01-12 17:58:43 GMT

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Any foreign-born MD who considers living and practicing in the US should also ask for a "FUCK YOU ICE" card that will tell officers that they are untouchable. Any action against holders of such cards will get them punished. 1st offense--loose any immunity and 6mo pay. 2nd offense--fired and dox essentially running for their lives. 3rd offense--firing squad made up of their former ICE colleagues.

2026-01-07 14:36:35 GMT

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When I interviewed at Comcast (BIG mistake, but my subconscious saved me), they had me take a test to debug issues on a CentOS 5 VM. Even though it was 7 years ago and before IBM bought Redhat, it was still old.

2025-12-12 04:47:17 GMT

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I was at the chocolate aisle in Target perusing the Lindt offerings. And older guy looked at an assortment of Ghirardelli squares and put one in his cart.
"I've learned it's never wise to get between someone and their chocolate. For the grandkids?" I asked
"Nope. These are for _me_." he said rather gruffly. I laughed, smiling behind my mask.

2025-12-07 00:12:12 GMT

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I loved asking a client "Same BAT time, same BAT channel?" if they want to schedule another session?
This guy's voice is saying that in my head right now.

2025-10-27 18:12:18 GMT

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Kinda dated, but still relevant.
https://files.sfba.social/media_attachments/files/115/447/479/475/625/534/original/3956fded751e5c12.jpg

2025-10-27 06:14:22 GMT

@npub1fdr…lvhs @npub19d9…gm9z
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P1EKQidRooc
Adam admits his home has a DoorKing for security. You can break into it by buying a key for it on Amazon. The same key opens ALL OF THEM, including the one on my front gate. Short out 2 contacts, and the door opens.
What's wrong with this picture?
https://files.sfba.social/media_attachments/files/115/444/656/470/581/446/original/f45fd25e4eef96a2.jpeg

2025-07-31 22:23:53 GMT

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Hearning disabled may not know about accents, unless someone interpreting does some special flourishes when they sign. That might be considered an accent. Which makes an interesting situation when the interpreter doesn't understand what someone is saying like Cockney Rhyming Slang or a super heavy Scottish accent.
I wonder what the signs for "wee lamb" or "Cheetoh Faced Ferret Wearing Shitgibbon" are.
https://files.sfba.social/media_attachments/files/114/950/185/420/339/527/original/a0fc9726dcf6ac38.jpg

2025-07-31 06:16:35 GMT

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This is the reason I like some books as audiobooks. I don't know enough accents to be able to hear them in my head when I read a character's dialog. Having a gifted voice actor who can shift from plummy RP to Glasweigean to North (Manchester/Birmingham) made listening to STILETTO all the better.
https://www.amazon.com/Stiletto-Daniel-O-Malley-audiobook/dp/B01DDZA98Q

2025-07-18 06:23:06 GMT

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This reaction will allow 47 to make a joke about the price of Brazil Nuts going up.

2025-07-16 01:32:29 GMT

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Shut up and take my money.
https://files.sfba.social/media_attachments/files/114/860/330/037/684/007/original/7623a5bb56b7fb6a.jpg

2025-06-29 01:43:22 GMT

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When a billionaire dies, who inherits their Senators?

2025-06-28 16:22:26 GMT

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When @npub1fdr…lvhs said he quit smoking because he realized he was burning through 2 to 3 laptops/year, this perspective boggles my mind.
I never smoked or wanted to. Both my parents and sister did. RIP.

2025-06-05 04:07:03 GMT

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I wonder if their editor convinced the author not to mention toxic bosses somewhere on the title. But there's gotta be a chapter in there on them along with borderline personality disorder and narcissistic personality disorder.

2025-06-01 23:44:45 GMT

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Tyson isn't a historian, so what?
People pointed out that certain bits of THE MARTIAN were thermodynamically wrong and chemically poisonous (e.g. the character burns _hydrazine_ to make water. Hydrazine is mega-poisonous and the heat generated woulda steamed him like a hotdog at a baseball game). The author's response: "I suck at chemistry."

2025-05-04 21:34:36 GMT

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After delving into Kevin Hearne's urban fantasy and mystery novels, I'm kinda jaded about the genre. A mystery has to have vampires, gods slumming it, werewolves, or some M/M action between the detective and a suspect before I show much interest. Oh, and the dogs have to be part of the story and help solve the crime.
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0BTRS5LD4
https://files.sfba.social/media_attachments/files/114/451/708/346/994/068/original/17b2d5fb93474482.jpg

2025-04-25 05:31:31 GMT

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I've gotten quite jaded about the mysteries I read these days. I much prefer queer couples like T. Thorn Coyle's doggie detectives in Portland's Queer neighborhood.
https://www.amazon.com/Sushi-Scandal-Street-Paranormal-Mysteries-ebook/dp/B0BBSSZD94
Or Vampires or Ghosts (e.g. Dead Boy Detectives).

2025-04-11 00:11:00 GMT

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Sadly, I've outgrown traditional rom-coms. I purrrrfer gay-friendly versions. Gay older brother ends up dating substitute chem teacher while younger bi brother drools over his new teacher.
https://www.amazon.com/Purrfect-Book-Curiosity-Shoppe-ebook/dp/B08W9RTWH4
https://files.sfba.social/media_attachments/files/114/316/427/870/356/438/original/9f18e33bd59c5671.jpg

2025-03-27 01:42:14 GMT

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I'm wondering if the chapter on root canals would be to much. I'd love to ask Bruce if he used that chapter to write off the cost of his dental work on his taxes.

2025-03-26 14:57:02 GMT

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When I told a friend of a friend who refuses to read any book with a page count greater than 250 abut this book, he had directions put in his DNR to not allow me to read it to him at his bedside should he ever be incapacitated.

2025-03-20 05:45:52 GMT

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If the author can explain quantum mechanics in similar fashion that Paul Sen does for Thermodynamics, I would consider that a job well done.
https://www.amazon.com/Einsteins-Fridge-Difference-Explains-Universe-ebook/dp/B08BZVJHH9
https://files.sfba.social/media_attachments/files/114/193/173/790/419/301/original/e9101253ec630a34.jpg

2025-03-20 05:02:02 GMT

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Don't fret. I took Quantum Mechanics twice in college. The first time was from a student of Dirac using his weird notation. We didn't use the textbook the instructor assigned for the course and I was lost.
The 2nd time, I took it from the same professor who taught Thermodynamics in a way I could understand it. Same for his approach to Quantum Mechanics. I did much better the 2nd time.
Granted this was all from a Chemistry point of view, so physcists might not care about chemical bonds or microtransitions in transition metals, but I did learn where those 4 quantum numbers came from in describing orbitals.

2025-03-08 20:02:45 GMT

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recently dove into JAMES which is Huckleberry Finn from slave Jim's POV. Amongst themselves, the slaves revert to regular English. Speaking to white folk, they code switch to slave talk. Interesting premise but I couldn't finish it. YMMV.

2025-02-24 04:31:06 GMT

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A friend won't read any novel over 350 pages. Used to be 400, but he's getting impatient as he gets older. He's stipulated in his DNR that I NOT be allowed to visit and read to him if he's incapacitated. Mostly because I threatened to read CRYPTONOMICON (900+ pages) to him in those circumstances.

2025-02-20 22:52:23 GMT

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Boom H
\ /
C = C
/ \
H Bah
is another way of stating the title of this book. But only an old chemist would get it. And we all know that old chemists never die, we just fail to react.

2025-02-18 19:57:26 GMT

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How Vicky treated her characters in this novel made me blacklist her as an author I trusted to not abuse her characters.
"Must suit other tastes than mine."

2025-02-15 21:24:56 GMT

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This was posted to Mastodon back in Jun 2024. Enjoy.
https://files.sfba.social/media_attachments/files/114/010/006/055/702/682/original/91bb15de647cddc6.jpg
https://files.sfba.social/media_attachments/files/114/010/008/445/209/153/original/195863bad35c8d74.jpg

2025-02-15 21:10:13 GMT

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I know what you must be thinking. If he was in an accident or something, he might’ve had some kind of traumatic brain injury that caused him to forget some things about his life, maybe even change his personality. And that's a valid, reasonable explanation. I have no doubt it's what the police would tell me if I reported all this.
But you know why I'm dead certain that man isn't my husband? He doesn't have a scar. If he was really Rick, he'd have a scar on the side of his forehead shaped like the golf club I hit him with. But there's nothing. Not a mark. Honestly, I'm this close to going out tonight and digging up my petunias just to make sure he's still under there.
I don't know what I'm sharing a bed with, but I know it's not my husband. So what the hell am I going to do?"
9/9

2025-02-15 21:09:58 GMT

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The final nail in the coffin, proverbially speaking, was Sally. Just this morning, she came knocking on our door. Her excuse was the tray of brownies she carried, but I think she just wanted to push her way into our morning so that she could see for herself what the situation was. After she left, I called her a nosy busybody. Rick laughed, kissed my head, and agreed with me. That was when I knew for sure that it couldn't really be him. Rick always used to get so mad whenever I insulted Sally, like I didn't have any right to hate her even though she'd been fucking my husband for years. But today there was none of that. He didn’t even try to defend her.
/8

2025-02-15 21:09:42 GMT

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Yesterday, about a week after he came home, the neighbourhood threw a street party to celebrate his return. Everyone from our street and the streets on either side turned up to see him and tell him how happy they are that he's alright. When he wasn't standing with his arm around my waist, he was milling around chatting amicably to each and every one of our neighbours, even the little kids. Jackson, our next-door neighbour Sally's toddler, wanted to play peek-a-boo, and Rick happily played along with a smile on his face. Now, my husband never did that. Rick always said he didn't like kids - that's why we never had any - and so he never wanted to play with any of the neighbourhood children. Especially not Jackson: Rick all but avoided him. Before he disappeared, I had started to suspect it was so I wouldn't see them together and notice the subtle but unmistakable similarities.
/7

2025-02-15 21:09:22 GMT

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Then one night I woke up around 2 a.m. to see Rick's face inches from mine just... looking at me with these blank eyes. I kinda gave this nervous laugh and asked "Baby, what are you doing?" And he didn't answer. For like a solid thirty seconds. He just stared, almost like he was looking right through me. Then he suddenly smiled and said, "Sorry, honey. Sometimes I just can’t believe this is real". Then he just rolled over and went to sleep. I didn’t get much sleep after that, myself.
/6

2025-02-15 21:09:00 GMT

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Then it was the golf. A few days ago, when he was out visiting his mom, I recorded a golf tournament that was showing on the TV. It was one of Rick's favourite golfers that was competing, and he never missed it. Once, he even skipped out on an anniversary dinner just to watch a championship. Only, when he came home from his parents' and I told him what I'd done, he just seemed... unbothered? Like, he said thanks and everything, and then he asked if I wanted to get dinner. He didn't even watch it, and that’s just so out of character for him.
/5

2025-02-15 21:08:18 GMT

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The morning after "Rick" came home, I made him a cup of tea. When I handed it to him, he gave me the brightest smile. Then he took a sugar cube from the dish on the table and dropped it into the cup. Our house was in chaos with his return, and I was still in shock, so I didn't think much of it at the time, but its been replaying in my mind ever since. I know it doesn't sound very significant, but my husband never put sugar in his tea. He was always adamant that it ruined the taste, and he'd get so frustrated if I ever put sugar in his cup by accident. And yet, this man had sugar.
/4

2025-02-15 21:07:26 GMT

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A week ago, I was in the back garden watering my petunias when I heard the garden gate creak open. I jerked my head in that direction and- there he was. Exactly the same as he was the day he disappeared. Same windswept blond hair and bright blue eyes, same curl to his pink lips. I was in shock. Our families had mourned for him, and yet there he was, standing in our garden like he had just popped out for milk or something. When I asked where he had been, he said he didn't know. He couldn’t remember anything about the last six months.
All our family and friends are beside themselves with joy. They almost can't believe it. But that's just the thing: I don't believe it.
/2

2025-02-15 21:06:52 GMT

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Someone posted this to Mastodon in Jun 2024. Enjoy.
"My missing husband came home, but I just know it isn't him.
My husband went missing six months ago. Just... went out to work one day and never came home. It was a horrible shock to the whole neighbourhood, because things like that just didn't happen in our little slice of white-picket-fence suburbia. The police launched an investigation, and the neighbourhood watch sent out search parties, but no one ever found any evidence to indicate what had happened to him. Our families were devastated. Recently, the missing posters have been taken down or papered over. The updates from the police became less frequent and dwindled away. I accepted that, hard as it was to admit, my Rick wasn't coming back.
Until he did.
/1
https://files.sfba.social/media_attachments/files/114/009/939/052/598/073/original/3d674817b9f250d2.jpeg

2025-02-15 18:27:44 GMT

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when I switched from gmail to protonmail, I put in the DNS mail records recommended on their site. However, their recommendation for the _DMARC caused all mail from me to be flagged as SPAM until someone here on Mastodon told me how to change the record so that wouldn't happen. So far, that's worked. Check out this article
https://support.google.com/a/answer/2466563

2025-02-15 14:57:18 GMT

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as a rule, Google and their cloud service don't do much to take down users that use their services to spamvertise. Used to be that Bluehost and GoDaddy would trounce spammers because they made a lovely squishy sound when you step on them, like tribbles. Enshitification has made them scale that back.
I continue to report Google and Microsoft source SPAM but it's like pissing in the wind. And I don't bother Opting-out. It just validates my email as active.

2025-02-14 19:26:41 GMT

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I made the mistake of buying a 2024 Gen 12 kindle. It's nicer than my old refurb'ed Gen 11, faster, bigger, with more storage. But Amazon has taken away the "I'm a disk" feature and I have to use their MacOS app to copy files to/from it via USB or Wifi. Also, Kindle books I bought stay on Amazon's servers and aren't downloaded to the device. My old stuff can be copied over and accessed, but if I want to jailbrake the DRM on the 200 books I bought from Amazon, I'm SOL right now.
I have to decide to stop reading the authors that only publish on Amazon and send the Kindle back to Amazon for a refund to get something else. I shoulda known better.

2025-01-31 02:47:50 GMT

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Just wait until the type is too small, even with the 3+ diopter CostCo readers. Then your knees will say "Stop that. You're not 20 any more." when you knell to get something on the bottom shelf at the supermarket.
It will happen. Now get off my lawn.

2025-01-31 02:34:22 GMT

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I don't know if it's just me but the type size on books is to small to read easily for me nowadays. I donated a hardcover book and bought the ebook because I could read it with larger font size on the Kindle.
[get off my lawn]

2025-01-31 02:32:45 GMT

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I've been reading a lot of self-publishing authors on Amazon. These books may not be top-tier writing, but I like the characters and stories. I haven't investigated what it would take to jailbrake them so when my old Kindle started having problems, it was easier to buy another one and continue reading my extensive library (and future new stuff).
It's the classic "it's to expensive/inconvenient to leave" problem @npub1fdr…lvhs talks about. For digital library books, my library restricts how many can read a copy at one time, so it's easier to acquire the ebook w/o DRM and copy it to my Kindle. I could do that on another reader, but if I switch to Kobo/Boox/Nook I'll have a hassle converting the self-published stuff every time there's something new. A big YMMV.
I sorta get how @npub1dnd…hzjs doesn't want to bother with all this and just let his publish do all that so he can just write. I just wanna read.

2025-01-12 00:37:47 GMT

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That's good to know. I have a blacklist of authors I won't read because they abuse their characters. Now Ian Banks is on that list next to Vickie Straub for the Shade of Magic books.

2024-12-15 00:54:02 GMT

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When Amazon put ads into their Prime videos, I tried to cancel my Prime service. The site wouldn't let me. I could only turn off autorenewal. So I had Prime for almost a full year and the site kept telling me how much money I'd save by having Prime. The subscription finally expired yesterday and I've already realized how much less I'll be spending on the site. Instead of just ordering something, I either don't buy it or it goes into an order queue until I reach $35 worth of stuff.
And when they added the ads, I stopped watching Prime Video entirely. I'd look at what videos they had and decided I'd get them from Kanopy or some other place rather than watch them on Prime. I just deleted Amazon Prime from my Roku. There are so many other ways to watch content without commercials that I don't need Prime in my life.
Textbook case of Enshitification.

2024-11-28 19:28:26 GMT

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I used to worry this my downstairs neighbor's impression of me after I lived in a student studio apartment in Graduate school. The guy upstairs wasn't a hippo. He was an elephant.

2024-11-20 19:37:11 GMT

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Jesus, that's a lot of yaml.
https://files.sfba.social/media_attachments/files/113/516/965/434/736/529/original/c804290b7c2dce9d.jpg

2024-11-20 02:03:44 GMT

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Julia Evan's zines are great for this.
https://wizardzines.com/zines/bite-size-pack/
https://files.sfba.social/media_attachments/files/113/512/823/062/138/899/original/2350dbf429e9e5bd.jpg
https://files.sfba.social/media_attachments/files/113/512/823/046/176/836/original/dd8ad2be57deecf3.jpg
https://files.sfba.social/media_attachments/files/113/512/823/039/344/201/original/b6d4434d86ab4bd1.jpg
https://files.sfba.social/media_attachments/files/113/512/823/061/824/038/original/3f325e4a3c9091ca.jpg

2024-11-17 22:04:34 GMT

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Not to downplay your lovely Robin, I over a pissed off BlueBird who's so tired of correcting my 3rd grade teacher that NOT ALL OF US CELEBRATE CHRISTMAS.
https://files.sfba.social/media_attachments/files/113/500/558/006/709/846/original/c308fdd39f896c0a.jpeg

2024-11-14 16:20:21 GMT

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Back in 2016, I had someone on my feed with lots of #MAGAIdiots friends, I'd start seeing their idiocy. All I had to do was post "What does Putin's Dick taste like?" to these people and their response would dictate if I blocked them.
Eventually, I gave up trying to weed them out, so I unfriended that one guy I've known for years who associates with them because he moved to their area. Oh well.

2024-10-28 01:03:41 GMT

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As has been said here, YES you can read ebooks from other sites on your kindle with 2 provisos-- (1) the ebook is in AWZ or MOBI format. There's Calibre to convert between the EPUB format to an Amazon-compatible version. AND (2) the ebook doesn't have any sort of DRM (digital rights management) preventing transfer.
I have a friend that can transfer purchased Amazon ebooks and strip off the DRM but I haven't done that.

2024-09-30 20:50:52 GMT

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DO NOT BUY ANYTHING FROM HP. Period.
A friend worked for Agilent and they were stuck using HP equipment in their offices. They were very happy when they sold their division, shut it down, and moved development to India. Customers will likely never see the product updated.

2024-08-20 06:17:52 GMT

Apparently, Trump's Campaign sent a Cease and Desist letter to @npub1ykc…302s. They posted a Tick-Tok response that's just to good to not spread far and wide.
I hope Donald is stupid enough to actually sue.
[It's a big file and I tried to post it, but I also put it on my web site. If your mastodon instance doesn't see it, try the link below]
https://www.vilain.com/LincolnProjectTrumpCeaseDesist.mp4
https://files.sfba.social/media_attachments/files/112/992/888/979/057/102/original/f8b4019b7b81ff43.mp4

2024-06-14 07:15:28 GMT

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You didn't mention mysteries or detective fiction. Sometimes I like crossovers like a gay fiction author who with his trans partner and pair of Corgis solves murders in the local Portland Gayborhood.
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0BTRS5LD4

2024-06-11 19:48:53 GMT

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I'll bet Grace Hopper is happy to clear out the cubicle next to hers so they can work close together.

2024-05-22 03:39:02 GMT

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I'm in the same boat, only it was 50 years ago. I recently listened to Paul Sen's EINSTEIN'S FRIDGE as a great brush up on Thermodynamics which I studied for my Chemistry degree. It was a great overview of how it became the science of heat transfer, who were the major players (I remembered a lot of the names), and it's implications in modern information theory (that was new).
https://www.amazon.com/Einsteins-Fridge/dp/0008262799
I'm hoping WHOLE STORY does the same for Biology as Richard Rhode's ENERGY did. Thanks for the pointer.

2024-04-23 21:51:24 GMT

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Leave it to XKCD to post something topical.
https://files.sfba.social/media_attachments/files/112/322/745/666/962/535/original/d45e0da32452b438.jpg

2024-04-22 18:15:07 GMT

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Yet another corollary to Murphy's Law

2024-04-22 16:40:09 GMT

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At least you don't have to figure out which side is "up" with USB A cables.